What Happens in Vegas

Several corny dialogues dot this RomCom that stars the vastly over rated Cameron Diaz and Ashton Kutcher. Lets see if I can remember some.  Go get your future ex-ex-wife OR you are so lame that your father would not want to hire you.  So screenplay as you can imagine is nowhere close to being reasonably entertaining. But then one has begin to expect that from a movie starring Kutcher.  That too nearly 4 years back when he was far from being a reasonable actor that he is these days.  And the number of movies that Diaz has definitely acted in can be counted on one maybe two fingers :D.  But I am not going to ever take this away from her that she looks stunning and will continue to look gorgeous till her dying day.  And lets see – is What Happens in Vegas any different from the other movies that we have seen which feature these 2 pieces of eye candy (together or independent of each other) – NO.  It is just a normal run of the mill each and every day kind of RomCom at best really.

Joy McNally and Jack Fuller pick the best day in their lives to get hitched.  They get smash drunk in Las Vegas after Joy is dumped by her fiancé. Joy has always had this feeling that she is not good enough for the man and takes this as an opportunity to really forget herself.  Jack on the other hand is a victim of a perfectionist father who cannot find anything right in what Jack does.  Joy is a stock broker by profession with a boss who is a prick to put it lightly.  With a name like Richard Banger, what else can you expect (now you know what I mean by corny).  Jack would like to take up his family business which is making furniture.  Mind you he is quite good at it but not good enuf for his dad.  So when these 2 naïve young creatures wake up the next morning, they have only one thing on their mind – how do we get out of this mess (read marriage) that we have gotten ourselves into.  Simple – tell each other and get it over and done with right? Wrong.  Wrong when you have just won yourselves $3 million!!!!

“What Happens in Vegas” was not really worth it for me to have put some other work that I had to do on hold.  But I didn’t take much time to figure it out and hence focused my energies in getting a few of my long pending reviews out of the way.  It is the kind of easy viewing movies that you can watch like any other RomCom.  Like you would on a Saturday afternoon cuddled up with a special someone idly flicking the remote in the breaks and maybe even having enough time to do something else on the side.  Not a movie that you desperately need to see.  Definitely not the kind of movie that I would have liked to finish the year on but well what the heck.  5 on 10 for this average chick flick.  Happy New Year 2012 folks.  See you on the other side on this year.

Watch the trailer at http://www.imdb.com/video/imdb/vi2092040473/

Tears of the Sun

Fresh on the success of Training Day in 2001, Antoine Fuqua, came up with his 4^th full length feature in 2003 – Tears of the Sun.  For those who are familiar with the Fuqua style of direction, it would not come as too much of a surprise to see a hard hitting, tell it like it is type of narration.  And he doesn’t change his style one bit in this action flick which is built on the situation of Nigeria being taken over by a ruthless military dictator.  So you can expect a lot of violence, blood and enough of gore to make your stomach churn in acute distress.  There is enough action as well for those who are keen followers of the genre.

Lt. Waters (Bruce Willis) and his team of Navy SEALs are given an assignment of “search and rescue” for a certain Dr. Lena Fiore Kendricks (Monica Bellucci).  She works for Doctors without Borders to help the victims of the civil war in Nigeria.  Now why is a French hottie doctor being saved by some American Navy Seals? Turns out she is married to some hot shot American and it is important to save her from the mess.  Well Dr. Mrs. Kendricks says she is willing to come with Waters and Team if and only if the Navy Seals commit to taking all her hospital inmates along with them.  Talk about holding the government to ransom!!!! And what do you know – Lt. Waters’ heart melts for the sick people and the hot doctor and he decides to lend his services to the nobel cause.  Sigh. 

But then, on a serious note, that is what the movie is all about.  One line that sticks out like a sore thumb and stays with you for a while after the movie is over is - "The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing".  This is a line by an Irish statesman called Edmund Burke.  The Right Honourable Edmund Burke totally knew what he was talking about and was bang on the button.  How many times have all of us good, bad or ugly not done something which was the right thing to do? Quite a bit I would guess when I count my own instances.  Guess all he and Fuqua are asking us to do is – something.  If there is an opportunity to correct some wrong then all we have to do to ensure that it stays is – nothing.  Interesting and perfect take I guess.

Tears of the Sun is a well made movie and worth watching either on DVD.  The performances from the cast are quite good.  Bruce Willis is – how can I put it – Bruce Willis. No other way to describe his effort.  Belluci looks stunning as always and I would be jealous of her boyfriend or husband – real or fictional – and in this case, I would not mind being her patient :P.  There are not too many other people in the movie to talk about.  The editing and cinematography are as good as Fuqua has always been.  A very good overall attempt.  I give it 7 on 10.

Watch the trailer at http://www.imdb.com/video/screenplay/vi2962030873/

Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy

Did you know that Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Spy (with commas) was a 1979 TV Series starring Alec Guiness? It ran for a full 7 episodes it would seem. I tried my best to get my hands on the book before I saw the movie but sadly could not find it . Will keep the search on for a while – not just for academic interest but because the movie is so heavy and slow that ironically you find it difficult to keep pace with it. Funny right. But one has to read the book before you can understand the movie completely. I guess you will experience it when you watch it. It is difficult to explain it in words. I will now add the mini-series search to the list of must watches as well.

Tomas Alfredson peels out the story layer by layer by layer and that too in a very disjointed manner. That’s what I would call giving exceptional credit to the audience’s intelligence. Sometimes it backfires like it did with Tree of Life. At other times it comes out exceptionally well like in the case of Pulp Fiction. And then there are really good movies such as TTSS which kind of lose it in an attempt to increase the intrigue.

TTSS is an espionage movie that forces you to concentrate. Despite its slow pace, you could actually miss the plot if you miss a few seconds – like I did. The good news though is that it allows you to catch up unlike a lot of other movies which don’t. It traces the story of British Intelligence which suspects a Russian mole in its highest ranks. The task of unearthing the same is given to George Smiley (Gary Oldman) who builds his own mini team of sorts and starts the arduous task of figuring out who is the actual culprit – Toby Esterhase (David Dencik) OR Bill Haydon (Colin Firth) OR Percy Alleline (Toby Jones) OR Roy Bland (Ciarán Hinds). They are code named – Tinker, Tailor, Soldier and Spy – not respectively.

TTSS has some really solid performances by the entire cast. Little known names such as David Dencik and the vastly under-rated Ciarán Hinds have come up with really solid performances. The movie has some outstanding editing and cinematography which is apparent within the first few frames. The use of light and colour is quite stunning. The only thing, if any, which could have been in doubt were the costumes. Not sure if there were some errors on that count – pardon me for not being familiar with the kind of clothes which were worn in the 70s. Cannot comment on the screenplay either because I haven’t read the book. However, independent of the book, the screenplay would be OK in my books. Overall, one of the better movies of the year. 7 on 10. Must watch again to be totally sure of the concept – willing to do it too.

Watch the trailer at http://www.imdb.com/video/imdb/vi3394673689/

The Back-Up Plan

I know, I know this is an old movie but then I have this compulsion of reviewing everything that I have seen darlings. “So please to be bearing with me” as they would say in colloquial Ingliss for those who have already seen this not so funny RomCom. But spare a thought for those who have not seen it and may make up their minds based on the writings of “is nacheez” (this insignificant person for those who may be unfamiliar with Urdu). There are some 4-5 movies more to be reviewed which are not recent movies and with time quickly running out for me in this calendar year – a little over 30 hours to go, I thought I should quickly get this over and done with. The Back-Up Plan is playing these days on HBO if I am not mistaken – maybe any of the movie channels from 341 to 361 on Tata Sky – forgive me if I am wrong.
Jenny from the Block may not be my favourite singer by a country mile but I must say that I have always liked the fact that she picks up extremely lovable characters in most of her movies and comes up with a performance which is sincere, honest and endearing. I guess it comes very naturally to her – especially when she plays “Jenny from the block” kind of roles. In TBUP she plays the role of Zoe – a 30 something (I am assuming) young woman who runs a pet store and is not really getting the right guy to be in a relationship with – hah!!! Whats new??? With Zoe, however, there is a peculiar problem – she wants to have a child. And quickly at that. Typically that requires someone from the opposite sex or as Zoe attempted – artificial insemination. Wonder what people back home think about the concept as such? Would a woman in India today, mind being injected with the frozen sperm of some unknown donor? Anyways, as luck would have it, she gets knocked up and meets Stan (Alex O'Loughlin) on the same day and lots of love happens – sigh…. As the write ups would say when u press the information button on your Tata Sky remote – hilarity ensues – always wondered who writes these; I am betting s/he doesn’t get paid too much.

TBUP is another example of a TV directors making an unsuccessful transition to movie direction. Whenever I study film and understand the difference between the two, I am quite certainly going to be in a better position to understand why so many of them just bomb at the BO. Alan Poul has joined the list of these bombs. Is he bad. Not really. Just not up there or different in anyways. Anyone could have come up with this as the end result. Even novice directors. There is hardly any intensity that he is able to generate with the cast. The saving grace for us men is the presence of 2 really good looking women on screen – J Lo and Noureen DeWulf. For the ladies there is Alex O’Loughlin. Nothing much to write home about the humour or acting either. Overall, an average flick. Watch if you have nothing better to watch or see or do at home. 5 on 10.

Watch the trailer at http://www.imdb.com/video/imdb/vi4230218777/

Sherlock Holmes – A Game of Shadows

We started last year (CY 2010) with the first Guy Ritchie version of Sherlock Holmes hitting the screens. I hadn’t started reviewing movies then but I can tell you it was a stunning version of Holmes. I have, am and will always be a huge Guy Ritchie fan. But most of us are used to seeing him in the Lock Stock & Two Smoking Barrels versions which he has achieved so much expertise over the years that there is no one that can build a sense of suspense and mystery along with acidic humour that has over the years become a trademark of Guy Ritchie. To me, it was a thought that would never have materialized in my wildest dreams. Guy Ritchie directing a Holmes movie??? But when you step back and take a look at the humour in Arthur Conan Doyle’s masterpieces, you figure out that this is probably up Guy Ritchie’s alley than anyone elses (no pun intended). Not only did he deliver the goods the first time around, he has set himself up for a genre of cinema which can be actually called “Holmes”
A Game of Shadows takes a look at one of the greatest rivalries that has ever existed in the fictional world. But Doyle’s build up and description of the rivalry is so superb that, someone who is not familiar with it could be easily taken for a ride. Some schools of thought do say that the rivalry was inspired from real life characters but it has remained an urban legend. We are talking about Sherlock Holmes v/s Prof. James Moriarty. A rivalry that closed with a “fist fight” of sorts at the scenic Reichenbach Falls in Switzerland. Moriarty is believed by most, and rightfully I must say, to be Sherlock’s alter ego. Quite certainly, there could be no one else who is as gifted with respect to the powers of deduction. And Ritchie has bought Moriarty to life brilliantly to say the least. Not to take away anything from Jared Harris who has done the role absolute justice to say the least.

This part also gets to life the character of Mycroft (Stephen Fry) of whom Mary Watson (Kelly Reilly) so dryly says, “There’s 2 of you is it”? And Stephen Fry is brilliant right from his first appearance during the movie with the simple nuances of Mycroft such as not shaking hands and then walking around naked in his house despite being a diplomat of significant repute.

The purist Sherlock fans may not like the Guy Ritchie version and believe that Jeremy Brett is the quintessential Holmes. I take nothing away from Brett who is in the record books for having played Holmes the most times. But give credit to Robert Downey Jr. who gets in his own charm with a nonchalance that is admirable to say the least. I loved the first part for sure and A Game of Shadows came upto the same level if not better. They could have gone easy on the slow motion sequences – some of which were definitely over the top. But the overall package is a mouth watering treat for a Friday evening. 7.5 on 10. Don’t miss it!!!!

Watch the trailer at http://www.imdb.com/video/imdb/vi1860541977/

Alvin and the Chipmunks

For someone who is heavily into movies, I do have some glaring gaps in terms of movies seen. So when Alvin came up with his 3rd movie, I was left in a situation where I consciously decided not to go because I had not seen the 2007 movie or the Squeakel as it was called in 2009. That the franchise has survived upto its 3rd movie is credit to the marketing brains behind the scenes is all I can see. Thanks to Movies Now, I got the opportunity to watch a movie that I haven’t seen before – a rarity on movie channels over the past few weeks (gets immensely boring at times). So on a lazy Sunday afternoon, after a good 10+ hours of sleep on Saturday night, I was quite pleased when I bumped into Alvin on the movie listings. However, my Sunday wasn’t too great with respect to movies. In fact the entire weekend was quite below par with the movies released and on offer on channels . Thank goodness it was quite good in all other aspects.
Alvin (Justin Long), Simon (Matthew Gray Gubler) and Theodore (Jesse McCartney) are 3 chipmunks who are… how do we put it…. Musically inclined. They live in a tree farm somewhere and find themselves transported from wherever they are to Los Angeles where they eventually bump into a song writer Dave Seville (Jason Lee). Now Dave isn’t doing too well with his mushy music and Ian (David Cross) who owns Jett Records thinks that Dave is done and dusted with his music career. The chipmunks find residence in a fruit basket that Dave forcibly takes away from Ian’s office. It takes a while for Dave to find them out and after a bit of resistance and identification of music potential, he takes them in. Things start going out of hand when Ian discovers the munks and turns them into overnight celebrities. Can the kids – as Dave calls them – manage the sudden burst of fame and success?

It is strange to see the success that Alvin has achievement over the years. It is at best an average franchise. The story line is nothing great – if anything it gets all too gooey and mushy for anyone’s comfort. The animation is barely average. The movies have never been rated highly by any critic or not so critical reviewers. It has offered nothing “new” per se for people to be excited about – I mean Chip ‘n Dale were much more fun. The voice overs could have been done by anyone using the right technology. The cast has to really force itself to act. Tim Hill’s direction is average at best (Whats the verdict on Hop by the way? Hasn’t released in this part of the world yet. Not expecting much after this.). Overall – not too great a way to start a Sunday afternoon. Kids would probably love it to bits – which would explain the success. Adults – worth a miss – 4 on 10.

Watch the trailer at http://www.imdb.com/video/imdb/vi984744217/

I Am Number Four

This is one of the movies that missed out earlier this year. One of the 8 or 9 movie release weekends which I simply could not get my arms around all through 2011. Hope 2012 is not as packed. On hindsight which coincidentally everyone is @ 20/20 levels, I don’t quite regret having missed I Am Number Four on the big screen. I picked up the book a couple of weeks back and finished reading it last afternoon. Picked the DVD over the weekend because I wanted to watch it immediately after finishing the book yesterday. The book by Pittacus Lore (I am sure that’s an anagram for something. Need to research it) is a fantasy which is not the best written super hero / fantasy piece ever. But to its credit, it is well paced, doesn’t take too much time to build up and is never short of excitement. Quite entertaining in short. And therefore, I was hoping that the movie will turn out to be a reasonably entertaining flick. Not to be.

We are talking about a planet called Lorien which has been destroyed by another civilization called The Mogadarians – Mogs for short. The Mogs have a simple funda – they pick a planet and drain it off all the resources. Once done, they move to the next planet. This planet hopping gets them to Lorien and the ensuing war results in the latter getting obliterated. However, 9 children have been saved along with their guardians and some animals – something like Noah’s Ark – and sent to…no points for guessing – EARTH (as if there was a paucity of planets). And thankfully they are spread across various locations on the planet. They are in hiding so that they can grow into strong Loriens one day and claims their planet back. The Mogs, however, have other plans. They are chasing the Loriens down to ensure no one is left over. The thing is that they cannot kill them at random. Thanks to a Loric spell, they have to kill them in a serial order. 3 have been killed to date over the past 6 years. Our hero is Number 4.

I have nothing against fantasia. In fact, you will notice through my writings that I love it. What cheeses me off is a weak attempt to get a super hero movie to life. There has been absolutely no emphasis on the background story from Lorien. The story has been changed in the second half. The Mogs have been reduced to a bunch of ugly looking gangsters who have gills to breath. The Mog soldier with his flashy, colourful, magical sword doesn’t exist in the movie. There is no emphasis whatsoever on #4s training. Add to that, performances which were barely average. Direction was barely OK.

What is that old saying – Never judge a movie by its book? 2 movies over the weekend which were based on works of fiction. One Day – I haven’t read but I am eagerly looking forward to getting my hands on because the story was quite good. IANF – wasted investment in both book and movie I guess. And yes – a sequel is in the offing – smart thinking but remains to be seen how it is executed. Thank God the DVD was priced @ a 40% discount. 4 on10 for the movie.

Watch the trailer at http://www.imdb.com/video/imdb/vi2997656345/

One Day

All over the web, critics have blasted Anne Hathaway for her use of a Yorkshire accent in One Day. Now I am no expert on accents and it was sufficiently British for me to stand up and take notice that Hathaway had yet again checked a box in my books. Always loved her from her “Princess Diaries” days but I thought she came of age only with “Devil Wears Prada” and a stunning one in “Rachel Getting Married”. I thought she came up with another great performance but then I am biased towards her so I leave the judgement to you because you would not want to give One Day a miss.
Jim Sturgess’ performance as the promiscuous Dexter who is best friends with Emma (Hathaway) is very good to say the least. I would have to agree with some of the critics who say that he was better than Hathaway but then, the role demanded that he be better. He did have more of the screen time. Almost all of the movie had Sturgess but very few that had only Hathaway – in comparison that is. I guess he didn’t have much of a choice but to come up with the goods.

David Nicholls best selling 2009 novel (must buy sooner than later) it would seem has not really come out as well as the book was written. It is an extremely interesting concept and a story line about mapping the relationship between 2 friends or lovers if you would like to call them that – or maybe soul mates – over 23 years. And all of this on just One Day – 15th July. Starting from 1988 which is the day that they both graduate and have their first fling, all the way to 2011. Each year shows how the lives of both the protagonists have progressed and where they stand vis-à-vis each other. I guess it was only a matter of time before they made the book into a movie. Very interesting concept.

You will find the way the dates are titled extremely good. 15th July keeps appearing scene after scene in some of the most creative ways. Lone Scherfig gave us the much acclaimed An Education, a bit over 2 years back and it came in with loads of accolades and 3 Oscar nominations. I haven’t seen the movie yet and am eagerly looking forward to it especially after watching One Day because here is a director who seems to give her characters a real “flesh out”. There are so many finer nuances about Emma and Dexter that she gets out over nearly 2 hours that it gives us a clear understanding of each person. I hope I am fair in assuming that she has done the same in her previous movies. The editing is quite solid and the use of music as well with some new tracks from Elvis Costello. The lead track is just “haunting”. Suckers for Romance like me will also shed a tear or 2 towards the end. It builds up beautifully to a superb Christmas weekend for 2 people in love. 7 on 10 from my side. But not necessary to watch on the big screen.

Watch the trailer at http://www.imdb.com/video/imdb/vi3449396249

Don 2

I liked Don when it was remade. The secret to that was to look at it as a completely different movie, independent of the Big B block buster which released some 3 decades earlier. A lot of people I know loved Don (2006) and the so called “purists” hated it to the core. I was, as accepted earlier, part of the former set of people. I thought Farhan Akhtar’s adaptation was superb and deserved a 7 on 10 on my scale to say the least. It was slickly made. It had great music. And most importantly it was finished beautifully.

The twist towards the end has kept people waiting for the past 5 years. Everyone who left that hall knew there was a Don 2 coming. It would have been stupid not to have capitalized on the brilliant opportunity that Farhan had created. Now why would he wait for 5 years to come up with Don 2 is a question only he can answer. It baffles me to no end. The concept of making the sequel along with the first movie and only delaying the release was not new to the industry when Don released. I would have released Don 2 within a year of Don. Excel Entertainment thought differently I guess. Excel was wrong.

Don 2 opens 5 years after the dramatic escape that Don (Shah Rukh Khan) manages to pull off under the noses of Roma (Priyanka Chopra) & Malik (Om Puri) and Co. By then Don has complete control of the Asian Drug Market and is hot on the heels of the Europeans who have created a cartel to kill him. But then as everyone knows “Don Ko Pakadna….”. So killing him would be out of the question right? After escaping from the attempted murder, he turns himself into the Interpol which continues to be led by his favourite Junglee Billee. All a build up to get into the same Malaysian jail that Vardaan (Boman Irani) is housed in and use his help in his next venture – stealing the plates for that are used to make the Euro from the DZB.

Don 2 may as well have been called Mission Impossible (Hindi). The list of inspirations from Hollywood is endless and that’s what probably disappointed me about this movie. Why? Because I think Farhan Akhtar is one of the finest directors and story tellers we have in our time. Why he would stoop down to “inspiration” is a bit beyond me. It will be for the first time that I would give a Farhan directed movie less than 7 on 10. Also disappointing is the finishing which is really Farhan’s forte. The effects seem “chipkaoed” (Stuck) and not seamless. The screenplay and dialogues lacked the impact usually associated with him with the exception of some instances such as “No Autographs please”. The story was well – nothing we haven’t seen before. The editing was just about acceptable. The consistency errors were just shooting through the roof!!! All very unlike Farhan. Seriously wonder if he was on LSD or something while shooting.

In the acting department, Boman Irani was head and shoulders above everyone else by a country mile and a half. No one but Shah Rukh can pull off this role which demands so much of arrogance – a trait that comes naturally to the King. Piggy Chops continues to look good as the Interpol officer who has time for a French Manicure and the best of fashion – but only look good. Lara Dutta is the sincere water girl, room service girl, courier girl, odd job girl etc. with no role per se and also ill fitting clothes. Kunal Kapoor’s role is pivotal but really badly essayed. To make matters worse the Shankar Ehsaan Loy music is lack luster to say the least.

In all, is Don 2 worth watching. Yeah I guess so. Is it close to Farhan’s best – nowhere. Worth spending time on? You would have booked your tickets by now and so go ahead I and watch it. Will you come out of the screen feeling happy – nope. Disappointed? – nope. It is the feeling of being let down by some of India’s finest coming together and delivering a product that is barely average which is worse than being disappointed. Is it better than MI4 Ghost Protocol – hell yes!!! 6 on 10 I say.

Watch the trailer at http://www.imdb.com/video/imdb/vi2265947673/

Take My Daughters, Please

My first predicament with Take My Daughters, Please (TMDP) is whether I should classify it as a Drama or a RomCom. It is not a movie that is really serious but it does deal with a topic that would be dear to any mother of four daughters who are unmarried. There is an element of Comedy but in bits and pieces – so definitely not a laugh riot. The romance element is a bit on the serious side. In the end, however, I would go with the RomCom option because there is something about the movie that is quite endearing and it leaves your happy and not morose or sad. It is playing on Zee MGM these days – Channel 355 on Tata Sky (you can send me the cheque for promoting the channel)
Lilah Page (Rue McClanahan) is a 60 something lady who is super excited about being on her first talk show and calls her four daughters over to watch her “live”. But she isn’t quite ready for what is about to hit her square on the face. With her on the show is a qualified doctor of sorts whose research comprehensively proves that women above the age of 30 find it really difficult to find a husband – leave alone a suitable one. And guess what – Lilah is a mother of 4 such daughters. The Youngest is 30 – Evan (Kim Delaney) and is in a relationship with James (Stan Ivar) for a while now. They aren’t committing to marriage because James is currently studying law and will take a while to get settled. Following her closely @ 33 is Jess (Stepfanie Kramer) who is in a relationship with a married man and knowingly at that. At 36 is Courtney (Susan Ruttan) who is a single mother again in a relationship with a man who hasn’t yet found his groove and keeps dabbling with odd jobs here and there – your typical nincompoop. And the eldest, a 39 year old Nell (Deidre Hall) who is too obsessed with her work and has experienced marriage once – enough for most people who have failed at it to not try again.

All of the above blends into a minor comedy of errors with Lilah taking it upon herself to ensure that all her daughters are married off before the end of the year and prove the learned doc wrong. Director Larry Elikann is an accomplished TV Movie director and he gives us a beautiful bitter sweet story which has, as mentioned earlier, its elements of fun but is balanced over all. Like most TV movies it is quite crisply made and feature film editors could learn quite a bit from Larry about how to edit a simple movie – simply. Larry gives us the right perspectives and brings out Lilah’s apprehensions and concerns beautifully. And he balances it out as well with the worries of the daughters. What happened to the world of simple straightforward movies? TMDP is a lovely movie to be seen on TV and plays quite frequently on MGM – even managed to catch a glimpse yesterday (the review is delayed significantly. I had seen it 10 days back :P). worth a dekko for this 6 on 10 movie.

Watch the trailer at http://www.imdb.com/video/imdb/vi3407191065/

R.E.D

In most of my movie reviews to date, I have given you a link to the trailer at the end of the review. Just in case you need to glance at it once after reading the review to make up your mind completely before taking the plunge. Or maybe change your mind despite a scathing review from my side. In the case of R.E.D., I am breaking from practice and slotting this first up. Watch the trailer first before reading any more of my review. Especially the last 15-20 seconds of the trailer.
http://www.imdb.com/video/imdb/vi2156856857/

Rajani Saar – I am really sorry. I did not mean to offend you. This John Malkovich fellow didn’t know about your existence. If I had known about the sequence, I would have seriously filed court case. But then, I thought, if John Malkovich needs a bullet to blow a bazooka bomb, Rajani Saar can turn the bomb around by just looking at it. No worries Thalaivar – John is about 45 years behind on the growth curve.

Directed by Robert Schwentke is a definite watch for those who love action flicks and performances put together. With the exception of a couple of sequences where they try to emulate God, the movie is a non stop riot from the first sequence. Frank Moses is a 50 something oldie who keeps calling up the number of the insurance company to speak to Sarah Ross under the pretext of a pension cheque that he claims to have never received despite them sending it over 40 times. But a sudden attack on his life by a bunch of guys who look like a SWAT team sends him and the movie and the audiences into a complete tizzy. 5 minutes into the movie and you are holding onto your seats for dear life.

After watching the trailer, if you do not want to watch the movie then I suggest you get yourself seriously looked at for a case of “I don’t like entertainment and would like to spend the rest of my life sulking” syndrome. R.E.D combines the best action sequences that you could have thought of. What do you want from an action movie? A combination of A Team, Expendables, Terminator, Predator, Commando, Die Hard? Well you asked for it and you will get all of it and more in R.E.D. And add to it exceptional performers who go by the names of Helen Mirren, Morgan Freeman, John Malkovich, Richard Dreyfuss & Bruce Willis. The rest of the cast just went pale in comparison. Now why would such a bunch of super stars indulge in inane action is a question I guess only they are best equipped to answer. And who are we but lowly mortals to comment on the choices made by them. Lets just recline back (or lay back on your sofas like I did) and enjoy the ride because they are truly Retired & Extremely Dangerous. No clue how or why I missed the movie earlier this year. 5 on 10 for story. 8 on 10 on entertainment. So lets make this an average of 6.5 on 10. Playing on one of the movie channels these days. Make an effort to catch up with it. Thou shall not regret.

Ladies V/S Ricky Bahl

A couple of weeks back I first watch a Female dominated Hollywood movie (The Help) and then a female dominated Bollywood Movie – Ladies v/s Ricky Bahl. I am at no point of time trying to compare the two in any manner whatsoever – don’t get me wrong here – there can be no comparison. But then, it isn’t surprising to see something that was long due I guess. We have seen quite a few this year haven’t we? Starting with No One Killed Jessica, Saat Khoon Maaf, to as late as early December with Dirty Picture which finally broke the myth that female dominated movies cannot be a success. LVRB would have also achieved similar results I guess.
The 2nd installment of the 3 movie contract signed by the heart throbs of last year no longer – Ranveer Singh and Anushka Sharm (does anyone know if the contract is still in place for the 3rd one or has YRF decided to let them go?) – seems to have been well received by the audiences. Despite YRFs desperate attempts to ensure that Indian audiences do not get well finished movies, LVRB seems to be well paced for the better part of the movie and has some good performances from the entire cast. Ranveer Singh takes his presence a notch higher in Bollywood with a performance that is a tad more confident than BBB. Anuskha Sharma continues to cement her position as the 2nd lady of Bollywood – and I am serious when I say this – she has the confidence, is spunky as hell, is prepared to work hard and has only Vidya Balan to compete with (not much of a contest honestly after Dirty Picture). No one else really comes close from a perspective of acting. I am quite certain she will do well.

The support cast is a mixture of debutantes and ad film actors. Dippanita Sharma Atwal finally gets some kind of a role in a Bollywood movie but she flatters to deceive in her portrayal of an IIT – IIM Engineer MBA. Ask her about either of these institutes and I am quite certain she will be left gaping. I moot a proposal that movie makers of any kind should first seek permission from the crown jewels of Indian education before slanderous claims that may significantly erode their fan following. And then there is a reasonably talented lady who seems to have used her relationship status i.e. cousins with Piggy Chops well to her advantage. And lastly there is the one who is better known for playing the pregnant wife in the latest Tata Sky Ad. All of them seem reasonably confident and come up with acceptable performances.

But one cannot make up for the lack of strong execution on an otherwise strong storyline. Editing gaffes, consistency errors, below par screenplay and dialogues – everything that you could expect from an average Bollywood masala movie – you will find in LVRB. The fact that the music is just about average doesn’t help either. Maneesh Sharma’s 2nd movie will make some money at the BO for sure but will it get him more movies – not so sure. If its any saving grace, it is as good as MI Ghost Protocol. 5 on 10.

Watch the trailer at http://www.imdb.com/video/imdb/vi2557845017/

New Years Eve

Cast
Ashton Kutcher, Lea Michele, Zac Efron, Michelle Pfeiffer, Josh Duhamel, Sarah Jessica Parker, Abigail Breslin, Sofía Vergara, Jon Bon Jovi, Katherine Heigl, Russel Peters, Robert De Niro, Halle Berry, Hilary Swank, Ludacris, Hector Elizondo, Jessica Biel, Seth Meyers, Carla Gugino, Sarah Paulson, Til Schweiger

Garry Marshall is making a habit of taking up a special moment in everyone’s life and converting it into a multi super starrer, multiple story line movie (MSSMSLM). We saw Valentines Day last year and this year it is New Years Eve. Whats the best that the next 2 movies are going to be titled – Merry Christmas and Happy Thanksgiving? Any takers? =D. But jokes apart, if there is anyone who deserves to be titled the king of the Romantic Comedy genre it is Marshall. I mean look at the list – Pretty Woman, Frankie & Johnny, Runaway Bride, Princess Diaries, Raising Helen and then the occasion based movies last year and now. Wow!!! Quite certain that no one can challenge this position.

New Years Eve is your average MSSMSL Romantic Comedy (refer previous paragraph for the expansion of this acronym). If you are a sucker for Romantic Comedies like this author, you are bound to shed a small tear or two thanks to the “Oh how sweet” moments that pepper the movie. There would normally be 6 stories in this genre of movies but in NYE, there are 9!!!! So lets start counting shall we?

We have a secretary who has apparently spent a better part of her life dreaming about what she wants and hasn’t done it till now. So her bucket list is neatly folded away in her purse. She works for an insensitive boss and decides that NYE is a good time to build a friendship with the local courier delivery guy who is too sweet to ignore her desire to complete everything on her list – all because it gets him passes for the Ahern Records New Years Bash. An organization that is owned by a mother and son duo since the father passed. The son has met someone fantastic the previous NYE and needs to meet her again as planned this NYE.

Then there are 2 couples expecting a child and are competing to be the one closest to the strike of midnight. There is a mother who wants to spend NYE with her 15 year old daughter who in turn wants to be with her first boy friend and get kissed when the year turns over. A Vietnam War Photographer who is dying of cancer and is regretful about. He develops a friendship with a nurse who is missing the love of her life who is serving in IRAQ or someplace in the middle east I guess. Then there is a super star singer who is also played by a super star singer. He develops cold feet the year before and runs away from his super star chef fiancé only to return this year to perform at the Ahern bash and the Times Square Party as well. Rounding off the stories are those of the organizer of the Times Square Ball (didn’t know something like that existed and now I have to see it in person) and that of a NYE skeptic who gets stuck in an elevator for 8 hours with a back-up singer for the super star singer. Phew!!!! I hope haven’t missed any.

All in all if you don’t get over awed with the over-supply of stars – who each get 7 mins and 48.38 seconds of screen time, NYE is a decent way to spend a Saturday afternoon with someone who really matters to you. Full points to Garry Marshall once again for having cemented his position as the King of RomCom. Just keep a look out for a bunch of teenagers and be prepared for their screams every time Zac Efron comes on screen. 6 on 10 like most Garry Marshall movies (with the exception of Pretty Woman).

Watch the trailer at http://www.imdb.com/video/imdb/vi673095449/

Machine Gun Preacher

Marc Forster has given us quite a few movies over the years which are memorable. Not in the league of a cult movie but just about enough to leave a lasting impression. Finding Neverland, Quantum of Solace, Monster’s Ball and that really cool movie called Stranger Than Fiction which I had rated as a 7 on 10. So it came to me as a bit of a surprise that the in the first half of Machine Gun Preacher, I felt a bit let down and as my movie mate in Bangalore, Kevin Mendonca, stated, “Not able to connect with it”. I think somewhere Forster took just a tad too long to get to the actual crux of the topic which was the orphanage in the war zone between South Sudan and Northern Uganda. Forster peels off layer by layer of the Sam Childers (Gerard Butler) onion. Could he have made it a bit faster and a bit more tight – I would guess so. I have seen most of his movies and haven’t found them to be ones that meander about aimlessly. Maybe he had a solid creative reason for taking it slow but I thought he could have ct about 15 to 20 minutes of the movie which lasts eventually for over 2 hours. Makes a world of a difference to the audience and critics alike.

The posters may belie your expectations about Machine Gun Preacher. I had seen the trailer a while back and could not recollect the South Sudan part till I walked into the hall. It was an eventuality before they made a movie on the South Sudan formation was the thought that crossed my mind. But it turns out that MGP was about anything but random conflict between nations. It is the true story of one man’s steely determination to not give up on the one thing that finally gives his life some purpose. From his days of being a biker gangster and drug dealer, Sam Childers came back home to a wife, Lynn (Michelle Monaghan) who has quit stripping to be a born again Christian. But Sam wanted nothing to do with it. He decided to stick to his gangster ways till he killed a hitchhiker in self defence and eventually finds the path to god. He visited Africa to do some social work but the experience influenced him like nothing else in his life and drove him towards starting the orphanage.

Trauma to the Lips, A child killing his mother, land mines blowing kids legs away, Children being burnt to death, snipers who are no more than 10 years old – Marc Forster has tried to make it as real as he possibly could. The version on screen these days seems to be heavily and obviously censored. As the movie moves along, it distinctly grows on you and you begin to relate with Childer’s statement towards the end, “If your child was abducted by a mad man or a terrorist and if I could tell you that I would get her home, would it matter to you how I got her back”? 7 on 10 yet again for Forster’s capability to keep the movie as true to life as possible and Gerard Butler’s solid portrayal of Childers.

Watch the trailer at http://www.imdb.com/video/imdb/vi3407191065/

Mission Impossible Ghost Protocol

Maybe what they say about sequels is true. With the exception of the likes of Godfather in the genre of serious cinema and Police Academy in the comedy space, I cannot think of too many franchises which have really made the cut with the sequels coming upto the same level as the first part. I am a huge fan of Star Wars and Indiana Jones as well. Quite a few in the animation genre - Toy Story, Cars, Shrek & Kung Fu Panda to name some. And what makes or breaks a successful franchise would be the bane of public expectation. Much like a hugely successful athlete, movie makers need to find that magic potion which will raise the bar every time that they put something out there.
So you would understand my apprehensions when I walked into watch Mission Impossible Ghost Protocol last night. Only this time, I was really hoping against hope that the strike team of IMF which caught the fancy of several people across the globe nearly 5 decades ago would come up with an entertaining and acceptable performance. Disappointingly and sadly, but not surprisingly, my expectations were belied - once again. The first edition of MI in 1996 was excellent simply because it was made in a manner well ahead of its time. The use of effects was stunning and to see a team of people do what almost everyone would perceive as Impossible was just the adrenaline rush that we were waiting for.

Most importantly, what they saw was bordering on the unbelievable but the operative word here is bordering. All of us wanted to be Ethan Hunt (Tom Cruise). But since then it has been downhill. Is it because of a change of directors? Moving from the inimitable Brian De Palma to one of the best action directors of our time John Woo to the little known JJ Abrams and now finally to the lesser known Brad Bird (Ratatouile & The Incredibles) seems to have done no good to the team from IMF. Tom Cruise’s acting skills have never been brilliant but what does stand out is his supreme ability to look drool worthy to the opposite sex at the age of 50!!!!! What is clearly missing is the emphasis on the villain. Jim Phelphs (Jon Voight) made way for Sean Ambrose (Dougray Scott) and then Owen Davian (Philip Seymour Hoffman). But in this one the villain seems to be more of a ghost (as the name of the movie would suggest). I guess much like James Bond, Ethan Hunt would be nothing without his villainous adversaries who give him the impossible opportunities.

A weak story line, several consistency errors, poor special effects, really bad sets (if you claim to be shooting in India at least make it real folks. Don’t make it obvious that you used sets) and poor screenplay dot the weakest of the 4 parts. At this rate it would not take long to make difficult seem impossible and not the other way round as is the case with the IMF. Even with Anil Kapoor’s 3 minutes and 32.83 seconds, 5 on 10 is the max I can give. I guess Don 2 will be better. Do something guys otherwise this franchise will self destruct in 5…4…Aaah you know what I mean.

Watch the trailer at http://www.imdb.com/video/imdb/vi2866585113/

Puss in Boots

His best friend as a child was Humpty Alexander Dumpty (Zach Galifanakis). By the way…did you know that Humpty Dumpty had a middle name?!?!?!? It would seem he does . And it would seem he had a troubled childhood where the other children in the orphanage would boo him to near death. And trouble him and trouble him and trouble him till he would run away to his den of sorts where he stashes away the beans he has collected for the day. Thanks to his fascination with Andy Beanstalk aka Jack who killed the giant and then stashed away the magic beans somewhere no one could find it. But Humpty knew or rather knows that these beans actually exist. But no one believes him. In fact they ridicule him for believing in a fantasy. Poor Humpty had no friend at all. None till “he” showed up in a basket.

He is all of 2 ft short… oops tall (6 inches at the time of adoption). Loves his milk and doesn’t drink alocohol. He is Rebel, a lover. He makes the fairer of the species particularly weak in their knees. He was all of 2 months old when adopted. Actually abandoned and therefore adopted by his mother of today, Imelda (Constance Marie). He first made his appearance around 7 years back with our green ogre friend and created quite a sensation. This is the story of where this 2 foot swordsman came into existence and the adventure that forces him to move out of his adopted village of San Ricardo. We have been speaking about the Pocket Rocket (I am beginning to seriously like this phrase) – Presenting – Antonio Banderas in and as Puss in Boots!!!!

The race for the final 5 for the Oscars is seriously heating up. I don’t think there are any other animation movies releasing this year as far as I know. While Puss in Boots would not come close to Cars 2 or Tintin, it definitely has it in it to make it to the top 5 for the year. The other 2 being Rango and Kung Fu Panda 2. But do animation movies have 5 nominations or 3. Someone please let me know. Coz Puss In Boots definitely deserves a nomination. Chris Miller (of Shrek The Third fame) gives us a wonderful blend of a classic storyline with the latest special effects through Dreamworks Animation which is just getting better and better by the day. So Pixar is not going to be feeling too lonely at the top I can assure you.

The choice of voice overs is superb. While we were aware of Banderas doing the voice of Puss in Shrek 2, the natural choice for Kitty Softpaws cold not have been anyone other than Salma Hayek. Billy Bob Thornton and the not so well known Amy Sedaris are superb in the voices of the legendary robbers Jack and Hill. The 3D quality as always doesn’t amaze me. I am not much of a fan but then the good news is that PVR has finally cracked a lighter solution for glassed. Super relief with movies releasing so often in the format these days. Enjoyable affair this story of a maverick cat. Do catch up. 7 on 10 is my verdict.

Watch the trailer at http://www.imdb.com/video/imdb/vi1870831129/

The Help

Who is Tate Taylor? Male. Aged about 42. Has acted in bit parts in about 7 movies to date including the much acclaimed Winter’s Bone and starting with the not so acclaimed Romy and Michelle’s High School Reunion (Mira Sorvino, Lisa Kudrow). He was classmates and great friends with Kathryn Stockett who made it to the big league as an author when her book titled The Help was published in 2009 – spending over 100 weeks on the New York Times Best Seller List. Well turns out that Taylor chose his friends wisely and eventually his projects too. His first movie as a director– Pretty Ugly People – wasn’t received too well. But I guess he fell hard and learnt really well. With “The Help” he has pretty much dispelled all doubts that people may have had about his capability to direct and write screenplay. Kudos to the winning pair for having given us one of the better movies from Hollywood this year (at least those released in India).

Something that has never ceased to amaze me is the absolute racial discrimination that existed (some say it continues to exist) in the southern states of the US – especially one town called Jackson in Mississippi. Now my information is limited to what I have seen in documentaries and movies but it has always made me feel so much better of the world that we currently live in. Kathryn Stockett has picked up the topic of coloured household helps in 1960s who had to face probably the most organized and gut wrenching experiences through their lives. Young American women in the 60s had their lives pretty much cut out I guess with college followed by marriage and eventually a litter to manage. But the ones bringing up the kids were called “The Help”. They were pretty much surrogate mothers and responsible for everything else @ home. Only to watch the kids grow up exactly into what their parents were and look the other way when it came to the topic of being treated equally. Painful right?

The movie is slow alright but keeps you engaged through great screenplay and fantastic performances. Viola Davis in superb the role of Aibileen Clark – who first decides to break the shackles by agreeing to interview with Eugenia 'Skeeter' Phelan played by the extremely talented Emma Stone. And Octavia Spencer in the role of the spunky Minny Jackson was as good. One cannot but appreciate the performances of the supporting cast – despite their not so positive roles – namely Bryce Dallas Howard. And then there was Jessica Chastain. Both are clearly asking Hollywood to take more notice.

I don’t remember the last time I saw a movie which was so dominated by female characters – all powerfully essayed. Long and as mentioned earlier, slow, but must be added to your watch list for the year. Not necessarily on the big screen but watch it because there are at least 3 Oscar nominations coming up – Best Adapted Screenplay, Best Actress and Best Supporting Actress. Mind you this is from the limited number of movies released in India this year. I hope I am right. If not, there are at least 5 more movies to be seen for performances which are much better. Good news either ways. 7.5 on 10 from my side for The Help.

Watch the trailer at http://www.imdb.com/video/imdb/vi809278745/

Land Gold Women

In a weak moment, my liking for the so called “alternate cinema” took over and I avoided a main stream Puss n Boots to go for what turned out to be a disastrous attempt at “Alternate or non Main Stream” cinema. My apologies to my friend who picked up the tickets at my behest cannot compensate for the pain that either of us went through while watching the movie. While she had enough and more phone calls coming through (thanks to her mother who had missed her train from Delhi) which ensured that she spent more time out of the hall than inside, I had to, of my own volition, go through the pains of watching yet another badly made movie on a topic that deserves so much more attention and sensititivity – Honour Killings.
Believe me, I had no idea about the topic of the movie before I entered the hall. And something in me groaned out – not again guys. But there was a different part of me which said – maybe… just maybe this time around another newbie director would have treated the movie better than people who have attempted it before. And when it turned out to be a British setting – oye apne Birmingham mein – I was even more curious to know how this would weave into an international setting. Only of course to be horribly disappointed as the movie progressed.

Zan, Zar aur Zameen (Gold, Women, Land as translated in that order) is supposedly an age old tradition which allows a certain sect of asian people to kill in order to protect them or protect their honour. A super conservative brother, Riyaaz Ali Khan (Hassani Shapi) comes into the British Asian household of Nazir Ali Khan (Narinder Samra) and generates latent feelings of pent up guilt in Nazir. Nazir had rebelled as a young man and migrated to the UK for a “better life”. His desire to redeem himself of the guilt manifests itself when he agrees to get his daughter Saira (Neelam Parmar) married off to an unknown “rishta” (alliance) that is sent through Riyaaz. Saira is however, in a relationship with David (Richard Kelly) who is a white boy. Sacrilegous!!!! How can can she even think of it? The penalty is of course “death”.

The performances are absolutely insipid with no one except probably Neelam Parmar who comes up with a decent performance. The urdu diction is so bad that after 5 minutes it rings in your ears like the most irritating sound you can ever hear in your life. And listening to Talat Mahmood songs doesn’t make you more Indian as compared to any other person in India right? And what pace!!!! Every action which would take a second in a normal movie takes 5 seconds in this one – Avantika Madam will find it really difficult to get another assignment if this is the pace she believes in? Honestly selpt off at least 3 times during the movie itself. 2 on 10 – highly avoidable.

Watch the trailer at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oAycBXZrlpg

The Dirty Picture

I must start this review with an anecdote from a few of days back. I was on my way back from the village (read Bangalore) and was taking the Indian Airlines flight. My song of the day was “Oooh La La”. Just kept humming it through the day. En route to the airport we were having this conversation that The Dirty Picture will be one of the top 5 movies of the year and that Vidya Balan will clearly get 2 nominations for the year – The first movie of the year No One Killed Jessica and The Dirty Picture. In fact, now that I think of it, she could win both awards – Best Supporting Actress for NOKJ and Best Actress for TDP.

Anyways, as I was humming the song and boarding the flight, I was also chatting up with my colleague. We did not say anything about Naseer Bhai – how can we say anything about one of the best actors of our time. We were just intrigued about his role in the movie and how he would essay it. We both agreed that Emraan Hashmi would have, by the end of the movie ticked off from his list another actress – only this time, it would be a genuine actress and not a random aspiring starlet. And the unanimous agreement – actually question was – What the hell is Tusshar (now without the Kapoor) doing in the movie? And as I was saying this out aloud, I entered the flight only to be greeted with a vision that I will not forget for the rest of my life!!! There on Seat1D, and smiling right back at me (surely she heard my comment about Tusshar) was Vidya Balan in all her simplicity. And did she look gorgeous? Hell Yes!!!!

I must say, that most of our discussion was bang on. Vidya Balan gives her 110% as always and generates an aura around Reshma aka Silk that will generate emotions starting from the rank depraved to the completely sympathetic thanks to the pitiful end that we know Silk Smitha had. Some really good dialogues dot the otherwise slapstick ones. But then it is The Dirty Picture. So slapstick was to be expected and I give Milan Luthria full credit for the same. Probably the best movie from the Luthria stable but it would not have been possible without the stunning performances of the cast.

I terms of other aspects, The Dirty Picture was probably below par. Editing was quite below par and the movie was way too long – probably 2.5 hours which turned out to be nearly 3 thanks to the breaks and trailers. While the songs were good, they were quite ill placed especially Ishq Sufiyana which kind of hits you out of the blue about 10 minutes from the end. And Honeymoon Ki Raat was also kind of wasted. I thought the movie could have easily finished in about 2 hours. Kind of moved away from the basic concept so aptly captured by Reshma that the movie business is about 3 things – Entertainment, Entertainment & Entertainment. 7 on 10 and definitely makes it to the top 5 movies of the year for me.

Watch the trailer at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NM8m4_DLZtY