Saturday 20 September 2014

Khoobsurat (2014) (Disney)

A 20 something eligibly girl is a physiotherapist (PT) for the Kolkata Knight Riders (defending champions of the IPL).  Apparently in the IPL, people are allowed to swarm onto the dressing room.  Once you have gotten over that minor aspect of security, you see this 20 something girl pretending to do something that is supposed to correct the injury of a star batsman Kapoor (no first names were given).


Kapoor is unresponsive to anything that the 20 something PT tries.  Simultaneously the PT is being dogged by her colleague or friend whose marriage is on the rocks because of a vacation that he may have to cancel. The reason for the cancellation? An invitation from the Royal Family of Sambalgarh, Rajasthan to treat the Maharajah who has thrown out 39 PTs before this instance.

Frustrated that her techniques are not working, the 20 something PT decides to throw caution to the wind.  She holds the star batsman’s leg by his ankle and pulls it hard. In this case, hard wouldn’t have moved a stool but it magically realigns the batsman’s hip bone or whatever it was that was dislocated.  He walks back in and smashes a maximum to win the match.  The PT goes off to Sambalgarh.

All of this has happened in less than 5 minutes of Khoobsurat.  If you are able to sustain it any further you will see a RomCom that involves a Bollywood Diva who refuses to accept that she can actually act.  The Diva plays the 20 something PT and goes by the name of Sonam A Kapoor.  I have always liked her but she is making it increasingly difficult for me to hold on to status quo.

You will also see one of India’s most talented actresses who plays the role of the 20 something PT’s mother.  This person has carved a niche for herself to play the role of the Punjabi Mom in Bollywood.  A casting director cannot dare to think of someone else unless she has refused the role first.  My request to Mrs. Kirron Kher is to carve herself out of that niche because she deserves much better.

Then of course there is a handsome young prince who is engaged to a sizzling hot princess.  But that doesn’t stop him from making a pass at 20 something PT.  Oh damn it!!! Why am I wasting my time and yours?  It will suffice to say that Disney’s Khoobsurat is a waste of time for all concerned including this writer.  It is tries to be quirky but falls flat.  Don’t bother to watch on TV either.  3 on 10.

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