Alone (2015) (Hindi)

"Kabeer ke Bina birthday cake nahin kaatungi" says Sanjana (Bipasha Basu) at her surprise birthday party organised by Kabeer (Karan Singh Grover) himself but in absentia. Her friend says, "Kaun kiss se zyada pyaa karta hai pata nahin". (we don't know who loves the other more). That's the story for the rest of the world.  But at home Sanjana doesn't want anything to come between her and Kabeer and is mighty cheesed about His hard working and social ways.

Add to that a back story that makes Sanjana believe that it was selfish of her to physically separate from her conjoined twin Anjana. When her mother is hospitalized she has to come back to Kerala (pronounced in the most non Mallu way possible) albeit very reluctantly. Why? Because of the morbid memories that reside in the house. Of course the memories are about to get more morbid (guttural sinister lughter in the background).

In Bhushan Patel's world of ALONE, there are Psychiatrists go for their rounds in hospitals in the middle of the night. The same psychiatrist runs a place that has been creatively named, "The Healing Institute". Did I mention that there are Tarot Card experts who can do readings with playing cards.  How awesome is that!!! Of course keeping knives below your pillow while sleeping keeps the ghosts away and it takes experience to learn that these knives may land up hurting the guy you are sleeping with.

Of course Bhushan Patel had not set immensely high bars for himself with movies like 1920 Evil Returns and Ragini MMS 2 - Do mein Zyada Mazaa hai before this one. In fact it seems like a contest wherein Patel is trying to get the bar as low as possible. I do believe that he has hit rock bottom with Alone at least in terms of attempting a horror flick - but then again this world is full of surprises.

The predictable middle of the night walks in a desolate house,  the gory looking face popping onto the screen with ashen white eyes, the heavy breathing in the background and of course unexpected noises from dark rooms which should not go uninvestigated - Alone is filled with such clichés and more at regular intervals. So even fattus like this writer will smirk at what is happening.

Bipasha in her short skirts and silk baby dolls is ineffective as always. I have a lot of respect for her stoic commitment to the hope that one day she will learn how to act and will deliver a performance that will make the world stand up and use the word actress with her. For now, the wait isn't over. But she does deliver a stellar sex kitten performance in the 2nd half where she goes all horny on Kabeer but not as Sanjana.... Eerie right. The rest of the cast is also unimpressive.

The music does a little bit to prop up the drab and predictable story. A scene or two here and there are placed well enough to give you goose bumps but that's as scary as it will get. 2 on 10 for Bipasha and Bhushan Patel's "never say die spirit". Keep it up fellas.  You will get there.  Some day. (mutters "yeah right" under his breath).

Watch the trailer on https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e0pdoezNhmc