M3 - Midsummer Midnight Mumbai

I will begin by saying that I did not watch this movie upto the grand finale.  A personal emergency forced me to leave just as the climatic sequences of this awful piece of work was about to begin.  There were several indicators that should have kept me away from this movie that I refused to acknowledge and therefore suffered like I have on very few occasions in the past.

First of all, any movie that calls itself M3 and then follows it with a corny expansion like Midsummer Midnight Mumbai should have told me that it was not worth spending my time and energy.  Next up was the fact that it was playing in some of the deadliest halls in Mumbai. I eventually settled for K Sera Sera Miniplex in a not so desolate part of Kurla West (actually Vidyavihar), Mumbai.

If these 2 were not indicative enough for me, I should have taken the hint when the cinema manager insisted on not playing the show because I was the only person who had booked a ticket.  I have a different grouse against a situation like that because I had taken the effort to come for the show but I should have taken the hint and the refund of my princely 80 bucks along with it.

A small fight and some harsh words later, a very shady looking couple walked in and picked 2 tickets for the same show.  And what do we know!!! It was showtime.  The couple probably cursed me to no end because it was definitely their weekly make out session that I ruined because I was about 2 seats away from them in the hall.  Of course they spent more time on the phone than pawing each other to death.

Somewhere in between all of this an expressionless and wannabe actor came up on screen in a suit that is associated with weddings of families that fall below SEC C (maybe even lower).  If the pointy toed shoes don’t make you gag, the fact that he walks into Madh Island Police Station (read converted bungalow rented for the movie) will definitely give you the heebie-jeebies.

Our hero – Rahul (Paras Chhabra) then proceeds to spit some dialogues about how he was murdered and he wants to register an FIR for the same.  With the same speed as he made an entry, he exits, leaving the constable on duty flabbergasted.  The element of suspense or intrigue ends with this sequence i.e. 5 minutes into M3.

What follows is an extremely low budget movie that has been shot worse than some amateur short films.  There is no semblance of a script leave alone the expectation of consistency in the same.  There is no importance to research or fact.  ACPs are available on call at remote police stations.  People in Mumbai remember car license plates at will.

People have started scribbling stuff like “Rahul loves Sapna” in indelible white paint that is unaffected by sun or rain.  Salman Khan is granted full pardon because it is the poor man’s fault for sleeping on the road.  You should not mess around with a law graduate because she will call the commissioner of police and request him to release a major suspect in a murder case – just like that.

There is absolutely nothing that was even mentionable about M3.  All aspects of cinema were sorely missing.  I have always been a strong proponent of a ban on below par movies.  I believe it is the censor board’s responsibility to ensure that people aren’t subject to crap like this.  0 on 10.

Watch the trailer on https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pN0pL8R_QXM