Cinderella 3D (Spanish)

I am not sure what Pascal Hérold’s past life was like.  The only thing I could find on imdb was that he also directed The True Story of Puss n Boots and it wasn’t something that could be called “critically acclaimed”.  Regretably, Hérold hasn’t progressed too much with Cinderella 3D.

Yeh Jawaani Hai Deewani

5 minutes into Yeh Jawaani Hai Deewani, you see Mohini played by an obviously botox treated Madhuri Dixit (looking really hot despite the botox). What makes it even more sizzling is that at nearly 40 years of age, this woman can dance better that all of the extras. And as tells Ranbir Kapoor something to the extent of, "Abhi Ladke ho. Ladke aur mard meing fark hai". If you r an MD fan, you may have a heart attack (in the positive sense of the word).

Fast And Furious 6

Thank you god for ensuring that my weekend was not completely ruined.  Thank you god for creating a director like Justin Lin who genuinely believes in the concept of raising the bar every single time he gets behind that lens.  That, is the only success formula for a hugely successful franchise that continues to enthrall audiences across the world every time they decide to make another one.

Hum Hai Raahi Car Ke

Jyotin Goel used to be a director in Bollywood in the 80s and 90s.  I am not sure if you remember a movie called Inaam Dus Hazaar starring Sanju Baba, Meenakshi Seshadri and Amrish Puri.  If not, then maybe u may remember Zahreelay (1990) or Safari (1999) both starring Sanju Baba in the lead. If not, then you must go back and check out these classics from Bollywood.

Ishkq in Paris

She turned 38 earlier this year.  So she would have been say a little over 36 when she shot for the movie.  Not an age that one would expect leading ladies to look terribly old right? But all efforts by the make-up man to mask the strained look on her face fail miserably.  Much like the movie itself.  Ishkq in Paris is as disastrous as Preity Zinta looks in her home production.  Will no one produce a movie for her going forward?

I Don’t Love U

This review is due for over a week.  I saw I DON’T LOVE U last Saturday afternoon thanks to a conveniently timed show @ Fame Neelyog, Ghatkopar East.  Or should I say no thanks to them.  It was one of the most painful experiences in cinema in recent times.  Thankfully the rest of the weekend was uneventful.

The Great Gatsby

This one can be easily termed as a classic. And it shows under classics on Amazon.  I tried to download and speed-read but I guess there wasn’t enough time.  I was expecting The Great Gatsby to release only next week.  I guess I need to be a bit more cued in.  But I must say that, 10 minutes into the movie, I thought it was actually true to the book – because that is all I could read before walking into the movie.

Epic

Those familiar with my writing, would know that I have the softest of spots for this genre of cinema.  It takes a lot to make a quality animation movie.  And the least obvious aspect is probably the quality of animation.  I say that because in this day and age, with the amount of technology that one has access to, anyone can come up with animation of reasonable quality.

Aurangzeb

Aurangzeb was known for his resoluteness towards one goal and one goal only – that of taking the empire from his father.  He went to the extent of jailing his own father for no apparent reason other than greed for the throne.  That, is the apparent logic for this thriller based out of Gurgaon that shows the deep rooted nexus between politicians, gang lords (mafia) and cops.

The Reluctant Fundamentalist

Remember what I always say about reading the book before you watch the movie? Well this time around, turns out, it doesn’t matter.  Because the book is ever so slightly evolved and leaves a little too much to your imagination.  The movie on the other hand actually unravels the mystery of the book into a simpler, understandable version to us.

Gippi

“Everyone gets big.  Only a few grow up”.  If you think that there is any pun intended in this line that is part of the trailer, wait till you watch Gippi.  The movie starts off with a 14 year old girl who says, “Tere aur bhi bade ho gaye? Mere toh ab tak chhote chhote samose jaise hain” (Yours have grown bigger? Mine are still small like little samosas) – I am sure that you know what “yours and mine” mean.

Star Trek – Into Darkness

If it weren’t for Star Trek – Into Darkness, my entire weekend would have been gipped (all pun intended).  I am only sorry that I saw Star Trek first and then landed up ruining the rest of my day with some crap that Bollywood decided to dish out as its summer bonanza of sorts.

Go Goa Gone

Predictably, the page for Go Goa Gone (GGG) on www.bollywoodhungama.com refers to the genre of this movie as Zom-Com.  It was obviously intended to be funny – the term that is – and does strike as funny for a bit.  Say it in your head a couple of times.  There were RomComs and now there are ZomComs.  Funny no?

 

What you will soon realize that the funny feeling lasts only upto the time that you walk into the cinema hall.  After that, it will dawn upon your pea brain that the joke was actually on you.  That you were the one who was conned by a superb marketing effort by the producers who lured you into the nearest hall to squeeze the living daylights out of you while you try and sustain GGG.

 

Hardik (Kunal Khemu), Luv (Vir Das) and Bunny (Anand Tiwari) are close friends who work together and stay together in what can be best called – A Bachelor Pad.  Hardik and Luv are lazy as can be.  They are also horny as can be.  The 3 of them take off to Goa after Luv gets dumped and Bunny gets called for a business presentation.

 

Here Luv conveniently bumps into the sizzling hot Luna (Puja Gupta) who also invites the gang to a rave party that is being organized by the Russian Mafia on a desolate island off the coast.  The main attraction – the latest drug that is sold in a red capsule and costs $100 a pop.  The side effect – everyone turns into a zombie the next day.  WOW!!!!

 

Now if you don’t find the story ridiculous then get a load of this.  To test if you are a zombie, the following tests have to be conducted.  First you find out what the person has had the previous night.  Next you ask him to narrate multiplication tables.  Then ask him the capital of Uganda and finally show him blood so that you can find out if he gets excited by its sight.  Wait a minute.  Why can’t we just jump to step 4 directly?

 

If you still do not find the concept ridiculous, then by all means go ahead and watch Saif Ali Khan making a fool of himself as a Russian Mafioso and drug dealer called Boris.  The music is nothing great.  The only saving grace is Puja Gupta in a blue 2 piece bikini and some other shots with not too much of clothing.

 

Are we in for a slew of Zombie movies in the days to come? We have had 2 in about a month or so.  I hope to god – and I seriously would like to pray – that we get over our fascination with this genre. I have never been a fan – Hollywood or Bollywood – of critters coming out of the ground and roaming around trying to be scary.  And Bollywood isn’t doing much to change my opinion in any way. 3 on 10.

 

Watch the trailer on https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4V5zGNVRmaE

Shootout at Wadala

Manohar Arjun Surve (John Abraham) scored 78% in his graduation exams in 1970.  At that point in time, it would have been stunning and would have put him at the top of his class.  But the Mumbai police had slightly different plans for the body builder from Dadar thanks to his involvement in a murder that his brother committed.

Bombay Talkies

Last Friday (26^th April 2013), I was watching The Front Row with Anupama Chopra.  It was the 1^st anniversary edition and the one that previewed Bombay Talkies with its four directors.  During the show, Anurag Kashyap and Dibakar Banerjee were waxing eloquent about Karan Johar.