Pirates of the Caribbean – On Stranger Tides

Picture this – Captain Jack Sparrow (Johnny Depp) has his arms held in a vice like grip, much against his wishes by 2 soldiers in King George’s palace and that too in front of his old foe or pal if you would like to call him that – Hector Barbossa (Geoffrey Rush). Not that its going to last for too long. In a swift move, Sparrow knocks the soldiers away with an unexpected jab on their family jewels. He then crosses their bayonets to fire into the chandelier above, jumps onto the dining table and proceeds to use all the lovely eats as his defence against the other charging 20 odd soldiers and running towards the window simultaneously. He uses a chair to shatter the window and also dispose a charging soldier through the same while in the same motion grabbing the curtain cord to propel himself upwards towards a ledge. He uses the same as a launching platform towards the chandelier that is half hanging and is therefore an extremely effective method to swing on to the balcony opposite the window, taking care of a couple of soldiers en route and yes not forgetting the sugar coated croissant that he had kicked onto the chandelier a few seconds before His Majesty came into the room. He then proceeds to knock off a soldiers cap – much like Jack Sparrow does – just to embarrass and un-expectant soldier and in the same breath leads him down towards a room but conveniently loses him by hiding behind a piano. He then goes to the nearest window and is making is way behind the horizontal flag staff but not before a soldier notices this and chops the cord off getting Sparrow to swing down towards the road, barely miss it and conveniently land into a chariot with an old woman who is as surprised as 2 year old getting her first birthday present. He kisses the old woman on the neck and relieves her of her earring (the kleptomaniac that Sparrow is) and proceeds to jump onto the roof of the chariot. He also manages to balance himself on another chariot for a few 100 meters before moving onto the roof of the other and eventually uses the signage of the “Spanish Daughter” to escape from the gaurds.


Hows that for vintage Pirates of the Caribbean???? Watch part of the snippet here http://www.imdb.com/video/imdb/vi2399378713/

Sword Fights with gorgeous Spanish women (read Penélope Cruz - Angelica), Mermaids who are fiercely protective about themselves (Astrid Berges-Frisbey – Syrena), the Spanish Armada, The Royal Navy, Ponce De Leon’s grounded ship on a ledge where Barbossa and Sparrow fight for a couple of silver chalices and the piece de resistance – Zombies aboard the Queen Anne’s Revenge, the ship captained by the most feared pirate of them all – George Teach a.k.a Blackbeard (Ian McShane). The fourth edition of this absolutely fantabulous fantasy adventure has it all. The director of Nine, Memoirs of a Geisha and Chicago, Rob Marshall, has set himself up for another slew of nominations (read hopefully wins) at this year’s Oscars – Costumes, Make Up and Art Direction – and hopefully some more. Nearly picture perfect execution with just a couple of slip ups to the very trained eye. Lovely camera work and superb editing along with great special effects make this edition of the Pirates an utter joy to watch. Fabulous entertainment for even the uninitiated because this one is not related much to the ones that came in before. Garnished with the traditional Pirates Track albeit in very small 5-10 second doses, the 4th edition also smartly sets itself up for one more to follow. That would mean more happy Pirate fans all over the world - Lip smacking I say!!! The humour is slick as always and the dialogues nearly poetic in parts. Johnny Depp scores yet again!!!

What amazes you everytime you see a Pirates movie is the sheer capability to take up something simple and blow it into something that’s larger than life to say the least. My Pirates brain gives this a 9 on 10 but the earnest, honest critic in movie says 8 on 10 folks for certain. In pure layman terms - Superb movie!!! Must Must Must watch for both fans and non-fans alike. Would have loved this to be the 200th post of my blog but that credit will go to Arthur unfortunately. This post could not wait till I finish writing Arthur which would be tomorrow morning.

Watch the trailers at http://www.imdb.com/video/imdb/vi762617113/ & http://www.imdb.com/video/imdb/vi3649608985/. This one truly deserves 2 trailers at least.

Scoop

“Never miss a Woody Allen movie if you have the choice” is a mental note that I had made a long long time back. I have kept upto the mental note to date. All of last afternoon post the doctor’s visit was spent in bed thanks to the antibiotics which put me off to sleep. I wouldn’t have gone to sleep had there been something reasonable playing on the tube. But the evening did have a silver lining on one channel. Zee Studio was screening “Scoop”. And adding to the eccentricities that a Woody Allen gets to the table, it stars who I consider the hottest Hollywood star – and I mean super sizzling flash point of water hot – Scarlett Johansson. Suddenly my flu had taken the back seat and almost disappeared – momentarily. About 2 hours later it was back to torment me and the antibiotics kicked in and started doing their job.

Joe Strombel (Ian McShane) is a dead man. Dead as a Dodo. In fact he is about to be buried. And in a different plane, he is being taken by The Reaper or Death (Pete Mastin), on his boat which is probably on its way to the ass end of nowhere. On the boat, Joe bumps into Jane Cook (Fenella Woolgar) who as you would have guessed by now, is also dead. Jane has a strong doubt in her head that she has been poisoned by her boss Peter Lyman (Hugh Jackman) who is the millionaire son of a Lord. Jane used to be Peter’s secretary. She also believes that she was murdered because she was on the verge of confirming that Peter Lyman is the dreaded Tarot Card Killer whose resume of serial killing has recently crossed double digits. The journalist in Strombel is unable to control his instincts since he believes that he is onto something. But how can a dead journalist make any difference to the scoop of a lifetime???? Simple. He jumps of the boat of dead people. He is bound to appear somewhere after that right.

Sondra Pransky (flash point of water sizzling – Scarlett Johansson) is studying journalism and is living with her friends in London. She is an absolute amateur. So much so that she lands up getting laid by famous director Mike Tinsley (Kevin McNally) and doesn’t get anything out of him. But her life is about to change really quickly thanks to her visit to see a magic show. The Magician Sidney Waterman a.k.a. Splendini (Woody Allen) gets her on stage for his disappearing act. But Sondra is not alone in the Chinese Box. She has company. Company in the form of extremely famous but recently deceased Joe Strombel. Strombel quickly passes on the message of the scoop of the century to Sondra and urges her to take up the case like an investigative journalist would. That’s when Sondra decides to go under cover and befriends Peter Lyman as Jade Spence along with Sidney acting as her father Mr. Spence for lack of any first name. As the Tata Sky information bar would say “hilarity follows” over the next hour or so in the Spence’s attempts to expose Lyman.

A movie that is shot in typical Woody Allen style. Eccentric, unstable, funny. Woody Allen has never changed his style of acting no matter what role he is playing. He continues to awe his audiences with his capability of doing the same thing over and over again but still getting a fabulous response. One can never tire of him I guess. Scarlett Johansson can act reasonably well – yes I was watching the acting as well – but she does get a bit over what is required many a time. Hugh Jackman is quite good in his portrayal of Peter Lyman – very British – although he is Aussie by birth. Extremely watchable whether you are a Woody Allen fan or not. Easily a 7 on 10. One more if you if you dig Woody Allen.

Watch the trailer at http://www.imdb.com/video/screenplay/vi2146763545/