Bang Bang! lost me
about 30 seconds into the movie. A senior intelligence officer, Colonel Viren
Nanda (Jimmy Shergill) walks into the MI6 headquarters to collect a gift – Omar
(Danny Denzongpa). Along the way through
253 layers of security, the colonel asks, “Woh London mein kya kar raha thha”?
If there could have been anything more insulting to the Indian Secret Service
(ISS) I would really like to know.
Showing posts with label Javed Jaffrey. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Javed Jaffrey. Show all posts
Thursday, 2 October 2014
Friday, 3 January 2014
Mr Joe B. Carvalho
I write this
review with no prejudice whatsoever to anyone or anything. In fact let me clarify at the outset that I
love Arshad Warsi and Soha Ali Khan. I
have been a fan of Javed Jaffrey as well for decades now. And needless to say Vijay Raaz is one of the
finest actors that India has produced in a long long time – one with a superb
voice as well.
Monday, 27 June 2011
Double Dhamaal
The occupational hazards of being an amateur critic. I have mentioned this in the past. And I guess it is too beaten to death to expect any sympathy or empathy. I asked for it I guess. Double Dhamaal is way up on the charts when it comes to inane comedy. But what keeps beating me is that why would a bunch of actors who are known for their comic timing and their skill in front of the camera actually make such a compromise and be part of a movie that is just downright ridiculous. I just don’t get why the likes of a Sanjay Dutt, Arshad Warsi and Javed Jaffrey would stoop to the levels of making it so obvious that their cash flow situation is in dire straits and they need the money really bad. I can still understand the situation of Kangana Ranaut and Mallika Sherawat and even Ritiesh Deshmukh but the former 3 put me at sea completely. Nahin Samjha :S
If the complete lack of even a semblance of direction doesn’t get to you, I am certain that the disgusting performances would easily do that. I am quite certain that most of you would be aware that the first edition of this series was based on the fantabulous comedy directed by Stanley Kramer “It’s a Mad Mad Mad World” which starred the evergreen Spencer Tracy. It was bad enough that Indra Kumar copied one of the better comedies made in the world to date – one that was extremely clean in humour as well as execution – and made it into a mockery of comedy. 4 years down the line, he has put us through one more such pain. And this time around he has kind of mished and mashed some kind of a spoof on Oceans 11 – or any other movie that you can think of which has a casino robbery in it. Basically nothing much that you can look forward to.
I am not delving too much more into the story coz it is quite bad. The same 4 irritants – Adi (Arshad Warsi), Roy (Ritiesh Deshmukh), Bomman (Aashish Chaudhary) and Manav (Javed Jaffrey) realize that Kabir (Sanjay Dutt) is now a big man into real estate but is all thanks to his wife Kamini (Mallika Sherawat). They decide to teach him a lesson but in the bargain get conned themselves of Rs.250 crores. The chase moves to Macau where they now try to get even once again with Kabir who owns a casino by now. The idea is to rob the casino and make Kabir suffer.
Watch Double Dhamaal if you are a fan of the slapstick and the ridiculously pathetic versions of comedy that have be show cased in the past in the likes of Masti, Dhamaal, Dhol, Thank You, Welcome etc. etc. etc. If you don’t like these attempts at comedy then I would recommend that you stay away from the halls. But then as always, I went out of the theatre feeling quite disappointed not because of the movie but because a significant chunk of the audiences actually laughed at some of the pathetic jokes. Sad sign for the days to come.
Watch the trailer at http://www.imdb.com/video/screenplay/vi3551894553/
If the complete lack of even a semblance of direction doesn’t get to you, I am certain that the disgusting performances would easily do that. I am quite certain that most of you would be aware that the first edition of this series was based on the fantabulous comedy directed by Stanley Kramer “It’s a Mad Mad Mad World” which starred the evergreen Spencer Tracy. It was bad enough that Indra Kumar copied one of the better comedies made in the world to date – one that was extremely clean in humour as well as execution – and made it into a mockery of comedy. 4 years down the line, he has put us through one more such pain. And this time around he has kind of mished and mashed some kind of a spoof on Oceans 11 – or any other movie that you can think of which has a casino robbery in it. Basically nothing much that you can look forward to.
I am not delving too much more into the story coz it is quite bad. The same 4 irritants – Adi (Arshad Warsi), Roy (Ritiesh Deshmukh), Bomman (Aashish Chaudhary) and Manav (Javed Jaffrey) realize that Kabir (Sanjay Dutt) is now a big man into real estate but is all thanks to his wife Kamini (Mallika Sherawat). They decide to teach him a lesson but in the bargain get conned themselves of Rs.250 crores. The chase moves to Macau where they now try to get even once again with Kabir who owns a casino by now. The idea is to rob the casino and make Kabir suffer.
Watch Double Dhamaal if you are a fan of the slapstick and the ridiculously pathetic versions of comedy that have be show cased in the past in the likes of Masti, Dhamaal, Dhol, Thank You, Welcome etc. etc. etc. If you don’t like these attempts at comedy then I would recommend that you stay away from the halls. But then as always, I went out of the theatre feeling quite disappointed not because of the movie but because a significant chunk of the audiences actually laughed at some of the pathetic jokes. Sad sign for the days to come.
Watch the trailer at http://www.imdb.com/video/screenplay/vi3551894553/
Thursday, 2 September 2010
Hello Darling
You would watch Hello Darling for any of the following reasons
1. You went for the show of Madholal Keep Walking (which I am sure would have been a far superior choice of a movie) but the show got cancelled.
2. Your definition of a good time is watching a slapstick sex comedy where characters are named “One Hung Low” (Chinese customers of course).
3. You get your cheap thrills by looking @ Celina Jaitley’s cleavage and it is sufficient for your fantasies for the next 30 odd days.
4. You are a movie critic and it is an occupational hazard.
5. You strongly believe, “Never Judge a book by its cover” and therefore you thought the posters did not do justice to the high quality of cinema that you expected it to be.
6. You ran out of places to make out and what better a place than a half empty hall.
7. You simply are a sucker for punishment.
Take your pick folks but avoid the movie like the plague.
Mansi Joshi (Gul Panag) is a department head in a local fashion house. Her boyfriend (Anil Mange) is in London waiting for her to say yes to his proposal. Her boss, Harddick Vasu (Javed Jaffrey) is the epitome of sexual harassment. He is married to Purvi (Divya Dutta) who believes that her ever horny husband is actually “Dudh Ka Dhula”. HDV’s secretary is Candy (Celina Jaitley) who is the atypical office blonde who strongly believes that what she wears is not skimpy at all. Candy’s boyfriend (Chunky Pandey) is a run of the mill musician who lives in with her. Rounding off the shebang is Satyavati Chaudhary (Eesha Khoppikar) who has been recently hired for a position in Mansi’s team.
All the women in the office are quite frustrated with HDV’s sexual advances towards them. But thanks to Mansi’s convincing powers, they stay back for as long as womanly possible. Mansi keeps resisting his advances and keeps swearing to herself that she will kill HDV someday. His favourite way of ticking her off is to ask her to make coffee. In a frustrated moment, she inadvertently adds Rat Poison to his coffee. When she realizes her folly, she finds HDV on the floor of his office. Total chaos ensues.
Hello Darling is definitely the outcome of a bet that the producer had with someone that even a lousy movie can make money in India. What surprises me is that there were quite a few people in the hall and more importantly, enough who were actually amused with the cheap slapstick comments. I guess the producer definitely won his bet. What surprises me even more is that quality actresses like Gul Panag and Divya Dutta are actually jobless. What else could explain the fact that they have willingly accepted to waste their talent on a senseless piece of work. Ladies – you must surely have been in some severe financial strain. Celina Jaitley as always can do no better than show as much cleavage as allowed by the censor board. Eesha Khoppikar doesn’t have much of cleavage to show but she tries to make up with as much skin as possible. Chunky Pandey is almost non existant & JJ is at his pathetic best.
Manoj Tiwari, it would seem was the Assistant director for the Subhash Ghai debacle – Kisna the Warrior Poet. Not that it would have made any difference if it was someone else coz the story in itself is crappy to say the least. A sheer waste of 2 hours is what is say. 1 on 10 just for the attempt I guess.
1. You went for the show of Madholal Keep Walking (which I am sure would have been a far superior choice of a movie) but the show got cancelled.
2. Your definition of a good time is watching a slapstick sex comedy where characters are named “One Hung Low” (Chinese customers of course).
3. You get your cheap thrills by looking @ Celina Jaitley’s cleavage and it is sufficient for your fantasies for the next 30 odd days.
4. You are a movie critic and it is an occupational hazard.
5. You strongly believe, “Never Judge a book by its cover” and therefore you thought the posters did not do justice to the high quality of cinema that you expected it to be.
6. You ran out of places to make out and what better a place than a half empty hall.
7. You simply are a sucker for punishment.
Take your pick folks but avoid the movie like the plague.
Mansi Joshi (Gul Panag) is a department head in a local fashion house. Her boyfriend (Anil Mange) is in London waiting for her to say yes to his proposal. Her boss, Harddick Vasu (Javed Jaffrey) is the epitome of sexual harassment. He is married to Purvi (Divya Dutta) who believes that her ever horny husband is actually “Dudh Ka Dhula”. HDV’s secretary is Candy (Celina Jaitley) who is the atypical office blonde who strongly believes that what she wears is not skimpy at all. Candy’s boyfriend (Chunky Pandey) is a run of the mill musician who lives in with her. Rounding off the shebang is Satyavati Chaudhary (Eesha Khoppikar) who has been recently hired for a position in Mansi’s team.
All the women in the office are quite frustrated with HDV’s sexual advances towards them. But thanks to Mansi’s convincing powers, they stay back for as long as womanly possible. Mansi keeps resisting his advances and keeps swearing to herself that she will kill HDV someday. His favourite way of ticking her off is to ask her to make coffee. In a frustrated moment, she inadvertently adds Rat Poison to his coffee. When she realizes her folly, she finds HDV on the floor of his office. Total chaos ensues.
Hello Darling is definitely the outcome of a bet that the producer had with someone that even a lousy movie can make money in India. What surprises me is that there were quite a few people in the hall and more importantly, enough who were actually amused with the cheap slapstick comments. I guess the producer definitely won his bet. What surprises me even more is that quality actresses like Gul Panag and Divya Dutta are actually jobless. What else could explain the fact that they have willingly accepted to waste their talent on a senseless piece of work. Ladies – you must surely have been in some severe financial strain. Celina Jaitley as always can do no better than show as much cleavage as allowed by the censor board. Eesha Khoppikar doesn’t have much of cleavage to show but she tries to make up with as much skin as possible. Chunky Pandey is almost non existant & JJ is at his pathetic best.
Manoj Tiwari, it would seem was the Assistant director for the Subhash Ghai debacle – Kisna the Warrior Poet. Not that it would have made any difference if it was someone else coz the story in itself is crappy to say the least. A sheer waste of 2 hours is what is say. 1 on 10 just for the attempt I guess.
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