Lakshmi

Within a matter of 24 hours, I am going to begin a review with the name Satish Kaushik in the first sentence.  This time, however, I am going to speak about Satish Kaushik the actor.  My respect for the man as a director is nowhere close to that as an actor.  Kaushik as an actor in a serious role such as Reddy Garu in Lakshmi is simply outstanding.  I hope to see many such performances from this brilliant actor in the years to come.

Shaadi Ke Side Effects

Many moons from now, there will be a question asked in any number of quizzes across the country. What is the significance of the dialogue, "congratulations - its a baby girl" in Indian cinema. The answer is that it is my good friend Sudhendra Sharma's first dialogue on the silver screen. To make things better, it is a credited performance. Notice Doctor in the Delivery Room in the end credits.

Mere Dad Ki Maruti

How do you successfully market a new car from the largest manufacturer of cars in India even though it doesn’t require any marketing?  I mean to say, the car is good enough and packed with a good amount of features and comes with the trust that this organization gets to the table.  But you still need to market it? If you do, this is how you do it.

Karthik Calling Karthik

It was only a matter of time before I got around to writing the review for this one.  Yes you can get the snide remarks started in response to this post.  Or even the corny jokes because nothing lesser would be expected as a response.  I am well aware and totally prepared for the same.

Mai

There is that old joke about this Parsee bawa (not a Sardar as is doing the rounds these days) who was asked what he would prefer – Parkinson’s or Alzheimer’s. The answer – Parkinson’s – because it is better to spill half your glass of whiskey than to forget where you have kept it in the first place.

Student of the Year

Let me at the outset clarify for the benefit of the younger generation who will be the key target audience for Student Of The Year. Just because the business tycoon Nanda (Ram Kapoor) decides to wear a striped tie over a striped shirt and a striped jacket with striped trousers – DOES NOT MAKE IT ACCEPTABLE FORMAL DRESSING!!!!! Ram Kapoor could have, with a little bit of common sense, refused to make such a clown of himself in front of a billion Indians. Thankfully, the gaffe is not oft repeated during the extended 3 hours that you have to tolerate SOTY.

If you walk into SOTY expecting the usual cheesy Karan Johar movie which includes any or all of the following, then you would probably leave the cinema hall very satisfied
1. There will always be a super rich boy – Rohan Nanda (Varun Dhawan) and a super rich girl – Shanaya Singhania (Alia Bhatt) who will be either great friends or having an affair. In this case it is the former.
2. There will be a school or a college – in this case school – St. Teresa’s. The school will be situated in an exotic location in India – say Dehradun – but will seem like it is actually in Switzerland and have a Highland Metroploitan Hospital. Metropolitan??? Dehradun???
3. Students of a School are allowed to dress in the fanciest of clothes. Boys in Tight T shirts that show rippling muscles and if not good enough can lose the T Shirt to reconfirm your deepest doubts. Girls will be in various stages of skimpiness but will be the homely “ghar ki bahu” types in behavior when it comes to it.
4. There will be a not so rich academically brilliant boy or girl who will enter the life of the school and will shoot to fame. In this case it is Abhimanyu (Sidharth Malhotra). But even this not so rich boy will come from a household that is an independent villa with 4 parking lots and cutlery at a dining table that is worth killing for – emphasis on killing and not dying.
5. There will be a series of events that will lead to some misunderstanding or a fight between the lead trio – in this case it is a doubtful relationship between Ro (that’s short for Rohan) and Shanaya where Abhi comes in as a prospective option for the woman. And there is of course the annual SOTY contest that has been conducted under the aegis of Dean Yoginder Vashisht (Rishi Kapoor) for over 25 years. The dean has since then retired and stays in his own 23.83 bedroom villa and continues to talk to his bonsai plants. Did I mention he was gay?

So if you expect all of this and the latest in fashion and some gorgeous bodies in various stages of dress and undress then SOTY is just the movie for you. Don’t expect much in terms of dialogues or screenplay or whatever it is that makes movies better than the rest. Definitely expect corny one liners like “Tata ke stocks hila dega aur Bata ke rates badha dega” (He will get the stock market rates of Tata down and the retail rates of Bata up).

You can also expect weird situations like when Abhi threatens his grandmother (Farida Jalal) – “Tumhe kuch ho gaya toh mein tumhare saath baat nahin karunga” (If something were to happen to you, I will not talk to you ever). Dear Abhi – your Dadi was on her death bed. If something untoward were to happen to her then it would only be death. How can you speak to hear after that anyways?

Karan Johar all over from frame 1 to frame 26543 – 3 hours of standard mush. With loads of crappy dialogues and slapstick one liners thrown in. Watch it at your own risk. But if you liked his previous movies then this is a must watch. 3 great looking human specimens on display though. Which Karan Uncle is quick to take the credit for from the first frame itself. All the best if you decide to watch it. 4 on 10.

Oh and one more thing. A couple of great tracks - especially the Radha one. And it is definitely better than Aiyya if you were to ask me.

Watch the trailer at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fivOhPjX9YM

Agent Vinod (2012)

In a recent quiz, I had asked this question - The kidnapping of a prominent scientist, Ajay Saxena (Nazir Hussain) prompts the Chief of Secret Services (K.N. Singh) to assign flamboyant X (Mahendra Sandhu) to this case. While on this assignment, X meets with Ajay's daughter, Anju (Asha Sachdev), who insists on assisting him. The duo is further assisted by Chandu aka James Bond (Jagdeep) and his gypsy girlfriend (Jayshree T). The two couples will soon have numerous challenges thrust on them, and will realize that their task is not only very difficult but also life threatening. Which 1977 movie am I talking about? The answer was the 1977 movie Agent Vinod – In service of the nation. I was surprised that a team actually cracked the answer.

The biggest controversy of course leading upto the movie was that involving our very own inspired music director Pritam. The Pyar Ki Pungi Song which was apparently lifted from the Iranian Song “Soosan Khanoom” bears little resemblance to the so called original. I think the Iranian Band Barobax should listen to some of Pritam’s other inspirational numbers to understand where the person can go down to. In fact they should thank Pritam because thanks to him, the hits on their you tube video have crossed a million. Judge for yourself http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SE63JoBA6iI. And they should also feel better because almost all songs have been copied. Including inspiration from that great ode to Russia’s Public Enemy #1 from BoneyM – Rasputin (in case you were wondering).

Now that we have got the useless pieces of trivia out of the way, lets get down to the review of the movie. Do not let the detractors tell you that Agent Vinod is a waste of time or torture (as someone said while exiting the theatre). It is in most parts a smartly made espionage movie – with loads of inspiration from our friend from MI5. It is great to see one from our part of the world. If you keep aside the corny one liners that Vinod makes – attempting to be slick like bond, you will breeze through the movie. And hope that you don’t get into a PVR which takes 30 minutes to start the movie and has a 20 minute interval!!! The cinematography is good. The titling is very well done and gives you feeling of a well made movie in the first few minutes only. The disappointing part was the lack of good finishing towards the end but one could overlook that I guess.

Sriram Raghavan (Ek Hasina Thi, Johnny Gaddar), claimed all the way through the build up that the 2012 movie which released today was in no way inspired by the 1977 hit (if I may call it that). I am quite certain there was an inspiration hidden somewhere. While I liked Raghavan’s previous 2 movies – and I wasn’t alone there, Agent Vinod I would guess falls short significantly. The last time Saifeena paired on screen in that famous size zero movie, audiences reportedly left the hall tearing their hair apart – or so I am told. I guess Raghavan had more confidence on them but the chemistry fails miserably. Mostly from Kareena’s side – and it has nothing to do with the absolute bias I have against her. Guess they are one of those couples who have chemistry where it matters to them as a couple.

I must confess that I found myself really enjoying the movie in parts and then Raghavan kind of stretches a point too far and lets the movie wander all over the place before getting it back on track. The good scenes like the fight between AV and Prince of the LTTE have been edited exceptionally by Pooja Ladha Surti (Ragini MMS, Johnny Gaddar). I thought it AV was enjoyable. I leave it to you to decide. 6 on 10. Definitely the movie to watch out for this weekend.

And watch out for the hotties - Maryam Zakaria, Vasilisa Petina, Leeann Roberts, and Malika Haydon

Watch the trailer at http://www.imdb.com/video/imdb/vi929669401/

Ek Main Aur Ekk Tu

Disclaimer – My disdain for Kareena Kapoor has nothing to do with my comments or views of the movie in the following paragraphs. The disdain has, is and will always be there but I am committed to giving a neutral and unbiased view of the movie and will not be swayed by my absolute disgust with the lady in question.

Shakun Batra was the assistant director of some sorts for Jaane Tu Ya Jaane Na & Rock On and something random with Don as well. So it was only a matter of time that she was given an opportunity for her first full length picture. And the part that she has written the story too (as claimed in the credits) should be taken with a pinch of salt. Shakun joins the mainstream Bollywood band wagon in true Bollywood ishtyle with an “inspired” movie – partially inspired from that Ashton Kutcher and Cameron Diaz starrer called What Happens in Vegas. The similarity of course doesn’t extend to the winning of a few million dollars but moves on to instead build fraandship etc. etc. Thoda “yawn” ho jaata hai (gets you a bit sleepy u see).

But then what else would one expect from a Valentines weekend release. I was in fact quite pleased that there were no tear jerking moments in the entire movie. Some which make you feel a little bad for the half an expression hero (read Aamir Khan’s nephew) but that’s about it. A pity though that the expression count has gone back in time to where he started from.

And the controlled excitement that the disgusting lead actress has is a welcome change from her earth shattering, chalk on the board squeaky types, performances that we are used to in the past. Boman Irani is as always picture perfect in his role as the over bearing father who believes in the adage from a shoe company (am I sounding too much like Times of India?) which said that at the Olympics you don’t win silver you lose gold.

Very disappointed though with the performances of the rest of cast with the wreckers in chief being Ratna Pathak Shah and Ram Kapoor both of who are fantastic actors in their own right and have needlessly gone over the top this time around with really bad performances. It was as if they had to do something to make the lead pair look good. So they decided to look pathetic in the bargain.

What is good though is the way Batra has ended the movie. A not at all corny end to an otherwise very corny movie all through. 5 on 10 after great deliberation. A point or 2 from the ever reliable Amit Trivedi for his music takes this movie to watchable levels.

Watch the trailer at http://www.imdb.com/video/imdb/vi443325977/

Udaan

I have no clue why I missed this one when it released. And I cant fathom how movies such as Lamhaa, Edge of Darkness, Knight and Day and I Hate Luv Storys would take precedence over screen time over such a powerful movie like Udaan. I can, however understand them giving precedence to Inception which released around the same time but which I am quite sure did not eat away into screen time so much that the movie houses could not have given Udaan more time. Surely there are more takers for quality cinema in India. Guess I am not right on that count.


Rohan Singh (Rajat Barmecha), Maninder Singh (Manjot Singh), Vikram (Raja Hudda) and Benoy (Varun Khettry) are four seventeen year olds who are in the last year in school. Obviously this comes with the excess baggage of a chip on their shoulders and raging hormones. They decide to play truant from the hostel @ Bishop Cotton Shimla and watch a soft porn movie – Kanti Shah Ke Angoor (ROTFL – reminds me of our days in college). As luck would have it, the school warden, Rathod (Sanjay Gandhi) is also in the same show. Our foursome cannot rush back to the hostel faster than Rathod on his moped thanks to one of them spraining his ankle. Since it is the 3rd time that they are in gross violation of school roles, all of them are expelled and now make their way back home.

Rohan’s dad, Bhairav Singh (Ronit Roy) is Hitler personified. In the words of his brother, Jimmy (Ram Kapoor), every dad wants his son to grow up to be like him and no one else. Add to that the frustration of having lost his first wife over 8 years back and a 2nd failed marriage that has left him with another son, a 6 year old - Arjun (Aayan Barodia). He hasn’t made an effort to visit Rohan in school over the past 8 years. And Rohan is blissfully unaware of Arjun’s existence. But after the initial friction, Rohan and Arjun both realize that they are both on the same side. Rohan wants to be a writer / poet but Bhairav will have nothing of it and forces him to work @ his factory in the day and study at the local engineering college in the afternoon. Despite Jimmy’s best efforts, Bhairav doesn’t budge.

Udaan traces the story of how Rohan tries to break free from the shackles of his ruthless father. But one cannot really help but feel sorry for Bhairav and is also compelled to think from his side – not that his actions are justified in any ways – purely with a perspective of intent. Ronit Roy truly deserves the Star Screen Award that he got for his performance in a “Villainous Role” although it would be very harsh to call the role of a Villain. They should be fair and actually give him the best performance for the year is what I say. I don’t think anyone who is nominated for the Best Actor this year in any of the awards has performed as well as Ronit Roy has. Full credit to him and the fact that Vikramaditya Motwane has extracted the performance from him. Motwane joins the list of first time directors this year. But what makes him different is the attention to detail, the ability to hold a story line and the courage to cut the riff raff. Udaan runs for a compact 134 mins with nothing which seems unnecessary and maybe a couple of instances of inconsistency – for instance, how did Rohan get into an Engineering College without passing class 12 (irrespective of the best efforts of his father).

I don’t mean to undermine Rajat Barmecha’s performance – which was quite solid – but it was clearly over shadowed by Ronit Roy. Purely my opinion. Ram Kapoor comes up with yet another super sincere performance – an attribute that one has started associating with him over the years. And a gem of a performance from the kid, Aayan Barodia which got him an award for the Best Child Artiste this year. Truly deserving. It is not for the heck of it that Udaan has received the best movie award @ this year’s Star Screen awards. Its truly a good movie. Was it the best in the year – probably not. Pipped @ the post in my books by Do Dooni Chaar and Tere Bin Laden both of which were super quality cinema. I would nevertheless give Udaan the same rating as these 2 – 7 on 10. Put it to your must watch list folks.

Watch the trailer at http://www.imdb.com/video/screenplay/vi1334248985/