Rang Rasiya

I began watching Rang Rasiya in the frame of mind of an amateur critic like I always do. The single minded objective was to find every mistake that Ketan Mehta made and believe me that I could find lots of them. There were errors galore to say the least and some of them made you cringe.

Kick (Hindi) (2014)

Dialogues such as “Scooter aur Bike ki dekhi hai.  Pele aur Beckham ki dekhi hai.  Par yeh kaisa Kick hai” litter Salman Bhai’s “Eidi” to all his fans.  Picture this dialogue against a setting of a certain Inspector Himanshu Tyagi (Randeep Hooda) trying to woo Dr. Shaina Mehra (Jacqueline Fernandez) and it loses whatever little impact it has.

Bullett Raja

Tigmanshu Dhulia is associated with hard hitting intense movies that have really solid dialogues and more importantly a really solid story.  Bullett Raja ticks most of the boxes but at the end of the day it is nothing we haven’t seen before.  The narration, the overall feel of the story, the performances and even the music had “seen that” written all over it from frame 1 (technically frame 1 + 10 mins coz I came in late) to finish.

Shahid

Firstly, the movie is called SHAAHID (like Afridi – for lack of any other comparison) not SHAHEED (as in martyr).  Just to ensure that there is no confusion on the pronunciation.  Shahid is based on the life and times of one Shahid Azmi (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shahid_Azmi) – a human rights lawyer who defended several people wrongfully accused of terrorism or related activities.

JohnDay

The posters claim, “An Edge of the seat thriller from the makers of A Wednesday”.  The similarity with A Wednesday unfortunately ends with the fact that Naseeruddin Shah was part of both movies.  The premise and story of JohnDay is significantly different from that of A Wednesday.

Raanjhanaa

I must admit that my initial thoughts about Raanjhanaa were not the most positive.  That Dhanush was part of the movie was one of the prime reasons.  I really didn’t see the reason for picking up a one song wonder as a lead actor.  I wasn’t aware that he was a National Award Winner (Aadukalam – 2011).  Needless to say, the 30 year old, Venkatesh Prabhu Kasthuri Raja aka Dhanush has made most critics (including this amateur one) eat humble pie.

Karthik Calling Karthik

It was only a matter of time before I got around to writing the review for this one.  Yes you can get the snide remarks started in response to this post.  Or even the corny jokes because nothing lesser would be expected as a response.  I am well aware and totally prepared for the same.

Inkaar (2013)

Lets rant out a few facts which most people will believe in provided they are sensible enough to believe in them.  Now I may be ruffling quite a few feathers when I say these things but those who know me well enough have heard me say these things in person.  So I have little to lose.  And more importantly, Sudhir Mishra seems to believe in these facts for sure.  Because he has used these facts (or clichés as I could say) very generously in Inkaar.

Love Shuv Tey Chicken Khurana

What is it about Punjabis and Punjab in general that makes them an ideal target for movies of any kind. Is it their loud nature that gives them a character that is quite unique as compared to any other sect, caste, creed or society? Or is it the fact that they are super colourful. Or maybe it the fact that they drink like there is not tomorrow. Or is it that they are just very large hearted characters - especially the Sardars.

Or is it just their Chicken and their capability to gorge on tons of the 2 legged creature that has become an integral part our lives as well? Considering that the earlier points were already beaten to death, Sameer Sharma - himself a Punjabi probably - must have definitely said to himself that it was time to get the humble creature into tinsel town. Not too many movies have been made which have a chicken as its central character right? Talk about identifying and opportunity.

For those who are getting other ideas, the central plot of the movie revolves around a chicken dish eponymously named by the inventor's wife. The inventory - Shri Khurana aka Darji or Grandfather (Vinod Nagpal) who figures out by chance, a recipe that sets the village of Lalton in Punjab on fire. But the recipe remains a secret. One that only Darji knows and now that he is senile with one foot in the grave, it would, in all probability go with him to the grave.

And so, when Omi Khurana (Kunal Kapoor) comes back in the hope that someone back home will help him solve the gangster problem of £50000 that he has got himself into, he is in for a not so pleasant surprise. Now, he doesn't have the money. The family doesn't have the money. Darji doesn't remember him or the recipe. And the deadly gangster (hilariously deadly) Shanty is after Omi's life. To help Shanty,a we have his absurd younger brother - Manty.

So, as you can see for yourself, there is very little that upon have to look forward to with LSTCK in terms of a story. The screenplay and dialogues are also nothing out of this world. They suit the purpose of the movie and give it a major Punjabi flair for certain. Maybe there were some nuances that the Punjabis would get but I wasn't too excited to be honest. Amit Trivedi's music is also not his best performance to date by a mile.

Kunal Kapoor has always been and will continue to be a director's actor. As Sameer Sharma is definitely not the kind of director who could inspire much confidence in any of the cast. Huma Qureshi takes off from where she left in Gangs of Wasseypur. Here is a girl who is here to stay. A pity that she will never move into commercial cinema coz she is just to large for the screen.

The rest of the cast are people who come from theatre and give the movie the fillip that it needed to stay afloat. But for them, Luv Shuv could have been a disaster. 5 on 10. Worth a demo but u could wait for the DVD or see it on TV.

Watch the trailer on http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xB9oO8bd7qM

Paan Singh Tomar

One can be quite certain that if Irrfan Khan has picked up a movie to be part of, it will be a good enough for at least a one time watch. And the world is going all ra ra about Paan Singh Tomar. So much so that I seem to be the last person in the world to watch it. Surprising right? Not when u have had a jam packed weekend with commitments to conduct quizzes in front of a massive 25 teams (notice the sarcasm). Bad call. Will be more astute in my calls in the future. Quite certainly, it has cost me at least 100 odd hits to this blog.

Tigmanshu Dhulia is usually a dependable director. But despite the rave reviews, I was a bit cautious approaching PST because of my previous experience with Saheb Biwi Aur Gangster – a movie that I thought had so much more than what it eventually delivered. But somewhere deep down, as I went into the hall to watch PST, I was hoping that I would use the words “Scorcher of a movie” when I write this blog later in the day. I wasn’t totally wrong. I wasn’t totally right either.

Lets talk about the good things first. It was firstly heartening to watch a movie that was centred around an athlete for a change. Probably because it makes it easier? I am not sure. But then I am glad. Also, as mentioned towards the end, it is dedicated to the unsung heroes of Indian Sport. Paan Singh was one such hero. 7 times national champion in the steeplechase – the toughest race on track. Winner @ International events. Forced to take a gun in his hand due to circumstances – genuine ones. Not whining ones. So – a good story line. Well narrated. Some great camera angles too.

The icing on the cake would have been the great performances. Primarily Irrfan who single handedly carries the movie all the way. Ably supported from 2-3 corners. Mahie Gill surprisingly under stated and good execution this time as Indira – Paan’s wife. Brijendra Kala & Zakir Hussain also doing extremely well to keep the movie @ acceptable standards.

What ticked me off though is that where on one hand, Tigmanshu Dhulia pays so much attention to detail, on the other hand, there are horrible consistency errors. Like the pain taken to put up a Rs.10 note from 1980 was very commendable. That it was a cheap print out was way too obvious. The camera work during the ice cream run was quite brilliant. That Paan Singh reaches major saab’s house with a shirt that seems recently pressed is just juvenile!!!

But I guess these gaffes are noticed only by the pathetic, heartless, stone cold, amateur critics like this author. But it still gives me the right to be disappointed with what I though could have finally been Tigmanshu Dhulia’s moment of truth. Where he breaks into the league of an Anurag Kashyap or a Vishal Bharadwaj. Not to be. 7 on 10 of which half the points come from Irrfan. As good as Kahaani – actually, Kahaani is probably better albeit marginally.

Watch the trailer at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=enwaoPOO0Ik

Saheb Biwi Aur Gangster

I think here is a movie that turns out to be a slight disappointment simply because of the sheer expectation that was built up before I managed to see it last week. It released right at the beginning of a 2 week movie drought for this writer. One of those periods which I dread because the choice that I need to make is between sleeping for 6 hours v/s 3 hours and the body is just not capable of handling those long long days without sleep. All courtesy that magic four letter word – WORK (what was your dirty mind thinking). But during those days, I was probably the only person at work who had not seen Saheb Biwi Aur Gangster. And the rave reviews of the movie only aided in getting my expectations to a high. Therefore when I walked into the movie hall, I was expecting a 6 on 10 at least, if not a 7 on 10. Ergo the disappointment of getting a movie which was probably a 5 on 10 to be absolutely fair.
Tigmanshu Dhulia’s debut as director was the Jimmy Shergill movie Haasil which, I was given to understand, was an extremely intense movie and a welcome change for Jimmy Shergill who had till then been labeled as a chocolate boy hero thanks to his mushy roles in the likes of Mohabbatein. Something that I have personally held against him all this while – Jimmy Shergill that is. Nevertheless, coming back to Dhulia’s capability to direct a motion picture – lets be fair and call it solid. He could definitely use some more effort in paying close attention to the final product along with the editing team to cut certain parts which got this movie into drift mode more times than I was comfortable. You could catch yourself just about drifting off at least a couple of times in the movie. I personally felt that he could have done with about 15 minutes off.

His capability to get the actors to emote on screen doesn’t seem to be questionable from what I saw in SBG. I have always felt that Mahie Gill was a one movie wonder and she did show signs of the commitment behind Paro, that got her fame and credibility in the first place. I guess the credit here goes to Dhulia. And I would say the same of Jimmy Shergill and surprise surprise – Randeep Hooda who for my money’s worth was the pick of the cast. Where were you all this time Hooda Saheb??? Release the true Hooda and his capabilities out more often I say. The only wasted opportunity by any of the cast would have been Shweta Narayan who could have done so much better with her small but pivotal role but I guess Dhulia could not get her to come up with the goods. The cinematography was again solid. And that’s what the movie was I guess – at the risk of repeating myself – SOLID. Nothing more. Nothing less. 5 on 10. Watch it. Doesn’t matter if it is on cable. Worth a dekko.

Trailer on http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0MpB95_ArXA

Yeh Saali Zindagi

It beats me. It beats me completely. Does the use of profanity through a movie make it spunky enough? The likes of a Good Fellas – which coincidentally holds some kind of a world record for the maximum number of explitives in a movie – doesn’t become a great movie because of the profanities. It has a lot to do with the other aspects of the movie such as direction and acting to begin with. And it would be fair to assume that someone like Sudhir Mishra who has given us the likes of Is Raat Ki Subah Nahin and Hazaaron Khwaishen Aisi would know better than that right. Surely an amateur critic like this one doesn’t need to point out these basics to the immensely talented director. But this amateur critic continues to see enough and more articles in the tabloids (cannot call them newspapers) that scream out from the front pages that likes of Yeh Saali Zindagi and No One Killed Jessica are creating waves with the audiences coz they are spunky movies. Does anyone pay any attention to consistency these days? Sudhir Mishra would definitely be embarrassed to see the end result of his latest so called potboiler. To point out something very basic, Priti (Chitrangadha Singh) calls Arun (Irrfan Khan) from a Bombay Vodafone number and not a Delhi number. Considering they have been in Delhi for a while and that Mobile Number Portability is not equal to circle portability as of now or when the movie was made, surely someone should have given some thought to that.


Arun is a CA par excellence who is required to keep Mehta’s (Saurabh Shukla) books in order. When Mehta cheats him of his share of the adjustments he stops working for him much to Mehta’s disgust. Mehta almost kills him but Arun refuses to join back. In the heat of the moment, Arun also decides to ask Priti to marry him. Arun had met Priti a while back when he was recovering money for Mehta from a borrower. He was instantly taken in by her but for some reason has never voiced what he feels for her to date. He now finds himself in a situation where he walks into a restaurant to see Priti coochy cooing with Shyam Singhania (Vipul Gupta) although Shyam is about to get married to Anjali who is the daughter of the Home Minster Verma. Now Verma is responsible for getting the local don, Bade (Yashpal Sharma) into jail. Bade is taken care of @ Tihar Jail by the local inspector Satbeer (Sushant Singh). He also has a soft corner for Kuldeep (Arunoday Singh) who wants to get out of the illegal business and go straight. He hasn’t been spending quality time with his wife Shanti (Aditi Rao Hydari) who is anything but peaceful about it. Completing this Egg Bhurji is Chhote (Prashant Narayanan) who is Bade’s transvestite younger brother and wants to eliminate Bade at the earliest and get his hands on all the money lying in various international bank accounts.

As mentioned earlier, Sudhir Mishra has tried to sprinkle this melee with several profanities and slang words which can be associated with Delhi but falls significantly short on the basic attributes of direction and acting. Chitrangadha Singh hasn’t acted in her life since Hazaaron Khwaishen Aisi (Maybe even there she had very little screen time to probably notice). No idea what the big deal is about Arunoday Singh and Aditi Rao Hydari. They are decent but nothing as great as the tabloids seem to be calling out. YSZ saves a lot of face thanks to the immense talent of Irrfan Khan, Saurabh Shukla, Yashpal Sharma, Sushant Singh (very under rated) and Prashant Narayanan who come up with sterling performances in their respective roles. Average music and bad editing round up this mish mashed movie which could have been made so much better. 5 on 10 at best.

Watch the trailer at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jXuLeso_jbg

Lamhaa – The Untold Story of Kashmir

“The biggest casualty of war is the innocent” – This statement kind of personifies the intent that the director had to give “The Untold Story of Kashmir”. But neither does he give us something that was untold but also keeps us waiting for the essence of the message to come through strongly. Yes there is an attempt to get the message across but Rahul Dholakia comes up short. Surprising that this is the same guy who gave us Parzania which was far more hard hitting and true to reality.


Mohd Hussain Rauf (Yashpal Sharma) is an undercover ISI officer in India who works closely with Brigadier Sharma from the Indian Army known to be a corrupt guy but no proof for the same. The key to their success is Samar Singh a power broker.

In an attempt to break their nexus, Col. Kapoor (Vipin Sharma) calls for Vikram Sabharwal (an extremely ragged 50 year old Sanjay Dutt )– an agent from outside i.e. outside of Kashmir returning after 18 yrs. Then current year is shown as 2009 and past is shown as 1989. Then Dear Mr. Dholakia, mathematically it is 20 right? Anyways… about 20 years back is when the leader of Azaad Kashmir movement Mir Owais Ansari was shot dead following which almost every male Kashmiri for interrogation. Thousands of such Kashmiri men disappeared sometime in the early 90s. Kashmiri Pandits left kashmir and no one tried to stop them. People had taken to arms. Sabharwal now makes his way back into the valley undercover as Gul Jahangir. No one knows about him and what do you know… no one can find out either 

People for Kashmiri Freedom is an organization led by Haji Syed Shah (Anupam Kher) who took over the reins after Mir Ansari’s death and adopted his only daughter Aziza Ansari (Bipasha Basu). Aziza is romantically involved with Aatif (Kunal Kapoor), one of the key members of PKF but is expelled due to his aversion to arms and wanting to make a difference without involving external militant entities like the Lashkar e Toiba. Aziza also is a key member of the Fatima Squad, a bunch of burkha clad women who like to take action against any societal atrocities.

Aziza starts rubbing the seniors @ PKF the wrong way when she inadvertently uncovers a sex scandal that involves someone senior from the PKF

Things take a slightly nasty turn when a 17th attempt is made on his life. But this time under the watchful eyes of Jahangir who smells a fish and takes to investigating it. Haji’s right hand man is Pervez (Yuri Suri) who seems to be like the fish. He poses as Yusuf Khan (now I am going to lose track of who he is… Sabharwal, Jahangir or Khan) and recovers a CCTV footage of the blast (wonder how it survived the blast in the first place). His investigations slowly lead him to Anwar who is the guy responsible for the blast and then eventually to the fish (Pervez… in case u have lost track of the review by now). But Sabharwal’s mission has just started. There is more to come and he needs to figure out what the root cause of the problem is.

There are several attempts from the director to try and paint a sentimental picture. He tries to do that through a village cornily called Dardpura which has half widows (who don’t know whether their husbands are alive or dead). Through a scene where Sabharwal wakes up to see a kid play with bullet shells instead o marbles. Through a bunch of kids screaming “Ai Ai Lashkar Ai - Bharat Teri Maut Ai”. But none of these scenes have any amount of intensity in them.

There are a whole host of corny dialogues – “God made Heaven. Man created Hell. This is the story of Kashmir” OR “Aakhon mein gussa har kashmiri ko virasat mein milta hai” OR “Aaj hamari identity I card banke reh gayi hai”. Mr. Dholakia – I refuse to believe that you made Parzania.

Several editing flaws and consistency flaws and sound editing flaws dot the movie. I have no clue why Sanjay Dutt needs to have a swagger in a movie that is oriented around Kashmir. Completely gets the seriousness out of the movie. Bipasha speaking Urdu… well the lesser said about it the better. Kunal Kapoor does not have even a % of intensity that he showed in Rang De Basanti. Performances are insipid all around. Wouldn’t highly recommend Lamhaa. Its at best a 3 on 10 for just the effort of putting it together.