Gang of Ghosts (Hindi 2014)

Most Satish Kaushik movies are fraught with corny lines that make your cringe.  Usually he is also in front of the camera to delivery these liners in his typical poetic manner but this time around he decides to stay behind.  Let’s have a look at some of these vignettes from Shri Kaushik’s latest release – Gang of Ghosts.

Bullett Raja

Tigmanshu Dhulia is associated with hard hitting intense movies that have really solid dialogues and more importantly a really solid story.  Bullett Raja ticks most of the boxes but at the end of the day it is nothing we haven’t seen before.  The narration, the overall feel of the story, the performances and even the music had “seen that” written all over it from frame 1 (technically frame 1 + 10 mins coz I came in late) to finish.

Zanjeer

I am a fan of remakes and movies that are inspired from an original script.  My only expectation is that the guys who remake it add value to it and not degrade the good work done by someone – in this case, a monumental piece of work that threw in the concept of “The Angry Young Man” into Bollywood.  A piece of work that has just been smashed to smithereens by a team that obviously doesn’t understand the value of Zanjeer (1973).

Saheb Biwi Aur Gangster Returns

The disappointing aspect about Bollywood is not the lack of talent.  I am quite certain that there are truck loads of people who are exceptionally but for some inexplicable reason, they land up making random commercial cinema which I am quite certain even they aren’t proud of.  Tigmanshu Dhulia definitely falls in this list of people.

Dabanng 2

Did you know that in a Zeus phone you can play songs and the package includes a camera as well? And did you know that in that phone, you cannot figure out that your own son is calling you to poke fun by pretending to be a woman who is cheating on her husband.

And did you know that the only way to be Dabanng other than being Salman Khan is to buy a Suzuki Hayate? Did you also know that you need to buy insurance to keep the future of your family safe? In fact, you can buy insurance products where you will earn continuously after death as well.

Did you also know that Hajmola is the best cure for an upset stomach? And that you could have more Hajmola to cure an upset stomach because of having too much Hajmola. And lets not forget www.xoom.com. That’s the latest word in money transfer. It gets your money across to your loved ones within 24 hours!!! WOW!!! I mean how cool is that? 24 hours??? Who could have thought of that???

Lastly, did you know that it takes a few weeks for Makkhi Singh (Arbaaz Khan) to figure out it was he who came back from the jungle. Oh come on!!! What am I ranting about? Maybe it is just my frustration and disappointment with all the irrelevant crap that I was put through for over 2 hours!!! Thankfully it was just a little over 2 hours but the 40 mins for ads and fillers also contributed

By now you would have figured out that there is very little to speak about in Dabanng 2. I know sequels are difficult to make and especially if you do not have the same director (Abhinav Singh Kashyap). But in case of Dabanng 2, it didn’t matter much. Arbaaz was as bad. Actually he was probably a bit better also. But that could not compensate for an absolutely stale story.

There was a title song, a street romaans (romance) song, a song in Dubai, a song with cops getting drunk and an item song. All by Sajid Wajid. Al sounded near identical if not actually identical. There were a few fight scenes. Actually lesser that Dabanng. And this time they weren’t even believable. Either ways, I should not have expected too much. Disappointing. It will do well but nowhere close to Dabanng. 3 on 10.

Watch the trailer at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7nPN1M9zVcI

Paan Singh Tomar

One can be quite certain that if Irrfan Khan has picked up a movie to be part of, it will be a good enough for at least a one time watch. And the world is going all ra ra about Paan Singh Tomar. So much so that I seem to be the last person in the world to watch it. Surprising right? Not when u have had a jam packed weekend with commitments to conduct quizzes in front of a massive 25 teams (notice the sarcasm). Bad call. Will be more astute in my calls in the future. Quite certainly, it has cost me at least 100 odd hits to this blog.

Tigmanshu Dhulia is usually a dependable director. But despite the rave reviews, I was a bit cautious approaching PST because of my previous experience with Saheb Biwi Aur Gangster – a movie that I thought had so much more than what it eventually delivered. But somewhere deep down, as I went into the hall to watch PST, I was hoping that I would use the words “Scorcher of a movie” when I write this blog later in the day. I wasn’t totally wrong. I wasn’t totally right either.

Lets talk about the good things first. It was firstly heartening to watch a movie that was centred around an athlete for a change. Probably because it makes it easier? I am not sure. But then I am glad. Also, as mentioned towards the end, it is dedicated to the unsung heroes of Indian Sport. Paan Singh was one such hero. 7 times national champion in the steeplechase – the toughest race on track. Winner @ International events. Forced to take a gun in his hand due to circumstances – genuine ones. Not whining ones. So – a good story line. Well narrated. Some great camera angles too.

The icing on the cake would have been the great performances. Primarily Irrfan who single handedly carries the movie all the way. Ably supported from 2-3 corners. Mahie Gill surprisingly under stated and good execution this time as Indira – Paan’s wife. Brijendra Kala & Zakir Hussain also doing extremely well to keep the movie @ acceptable standards.

What ticked me off though is that where on one hand, Tigmanshu Dhulia pays so much attention to detail, on the other hand, there are horrible consistency errors. Like the pain taken to put up a Rs.10 note from 1980 was very commendable. That it was a cheap print out was way too obvious. The camera work during the ice cream run was quite brilliant. That Paan Singh reaches major saab’s house with a shirt that seems recently pressed is just juvenile!!!

But I guess these gaffes are noticed only by the pathetic, heartless, stone cold, amateur critics like this author. But it still gives me the right to be disappointed with what I though could have finally been Tigmanshu Dhulia’s moment of truth. Where he breaks into the league of an Anurag Kashyap or a Vishal Bharadwaj. Not to be. 7 on 10 of which half the points come from Irrfan. As good as Kahaani – actually, Kahaani is probably better albeit marginally.

Watch the trailer at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=enwaoPOO0Ik

Saheb Biwi Aur Gangster

I think here is a movie that turns out to be a slight disappointment simply because of the sheer expectation that was built up before I managed to see it last week. It released right at the beginning of a 2 week movie drought for this writer. One of those periods which I dread because the choice that I need to make is between sleeping for 6 hours v/s 3 hours and the body is just not capable of handling those long long days without sleep. All courtesy that magic four letter word – WORK (what was your dirty mind thinking). But during those days, I was probably the only person at work who had not seen Saheb Biwi Aur Gangster. And the rave reviews of the movie only aided in getting my expectations to a high. Therefore when I walked into the movie hall, I was expecting a 6 on 10 at least, if not a 7 on 10. Ergo the disappointment of getting a movie which was probably a 5 on 10 to be absolutely fair.
Tigmanshu Dhulia’s debut as director was the Jimmy Shergill movie Haasil which, I was given to understand, was an extremely intense movie and a welcome change for Jimmy Shergill who had till then been labeled as a chocolate boy hero thanks to his mushy roles in the likes of Mohabbatein. Something that I have personally held against him all this while – Jimmy Shergill that is. Nevertheless, coming back to Dhulia’s capability to direct a motion picture – lets be fair and call it solid. He could definitely use some more effort in paying close attention to the final product along with the editing team to cut certain parts which got this movie into drift mode more times than I was comfortable. You could catch yourself just about drifting off at least a couple of times in the movie. I personally felt that he could have done with about 15 minutes off.

His capability to get the actors to emote on screen doesn’t seem to be questionable from what I saw in SBG. I have always felt that Mahie Gill was a one movie wonder and she did show signs of the commitment behind Paro, that got her fame and credibility in the first place. I guess the credit here goes to Dhulia. And I would say the same of Jimmy Shergill and surprise surprise – Randeep Hooda who for my money’s worth was the pick of the cast. Where were you all this time Hooda Saheb??? Release the true Hooda and his capabilities out more often I say. The only wasted opportunity by any of the cast would have been Shweta Narayan who could have done so much better with her small but pivotal role but I guess Dhulia could not get her to come up with the goods. The cinematography was again solid. And that’s what the movie was I guess – at the risk of repeating myself – SOLID. Nothing more. Nothing less. 5 on 10. Watch it. Doesn’t matter if it is on cable. Worth a dekko.

Trailer on http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0MpB95_ArXA

Not a Love Story

Ram Gopal Varma could not have picked up a better time for the trailers of his movie to be released and then the eventual movie release. It was bang at the time when the verdict on the Maria Susairaj case was about to be announced. A couple of weeks into the trailer and one of the most absurd verdicts (that’s what I believe – it is totally personal) ever by the Indian judiciary was announced. I guess it has been a little under a month since the verdict and unfortunately for RGV, Anna and the World Champions, for totally different reasons, have hogged the lime light. As of now, everyone in this country is interested only in the Jan Lokpal Bill. And maybe a few would be interested in knowing the build up of the Susairaj case and where it finished.

And why in the blazes would RGV start the movie with a disclaimer that this is a work of fiction. Surely all of us know that the movie is about the Susairaj case and it would only mean that Maria Madam and Jerome Sir refused to co-operate with the RGV Factory in terms on the money that was offered. Maybe they will cash in on it over time at a much higher level – crime is after all a very lucrative profession as has been proved in the past in more developed economies.

That being said, RGV also ends the movie with 4 dramatic statements – please don’t hold me to this because it may not be verbatim but I am quite certain it was something to this extent.
“The Prosecution wanted both of them to be killed
Their lawyers wanted them to kill each other
The two of them wanted to die together
Finally the verdict is still awaited”
RGV Sir – Gross!!!! How much cornier do you want to get?

The movie starts off with great promise and intensity thanks to Deepak Dobriyal who has put up another stellar performance and kind of keeps the movie alive. I was quite intrigued though with the choice of Dobriyal for this role but he comes out on tops. RGV uses his signature camera angles which are a bit off beat and it does make you think that RGV is back. But then one starts feeling a tad giddy in a bit. But for a couple of specific shots which gave the output that was desired, the other angles only made the movie look more like a horror story and not one that was based on a crime of passion. Mahie Gill has never been able to get back to the near perfect performance she gave in Dev D. I guess it will continue to be her nemesis in a manner of speaking. Needs to stop trying too hard to get there. The same syndrome as Jr. B after Yuva. Not much of a support cast with the exception of Zakir Hussain (remember Rashid in Sarakar) who is the only person who comes close to Dobriyal’s performance.

Overall disappointing. I was so hoping that RGV was back. I really like RGV and find it quite sad that he seems to have gone onto a different planet. Either we need to join him there or he needs to get back to Mother Earth. 5 on 10 is what I would give NALS. Watchable but don’t expect too much.

Watch the trailer at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wrbcn2k-FMI

Utt Pataang

If it has Vinay Pathak in it along with the usual stage performers union thrown in, one is bound to make an assumption that the movie would be a good one. And you are also quite certain that these movies will not last beyond a week coz for some reason people don’t quite see the star value – which is what sells in India. Having said that, we did have 2-3 great movies last year without any star value whatsoever – a trend that is slowly but surely picking up in India. A trend that debutante director, Srikanth V Velagaleti doesn’t quite capitalize on with some loose direction and loads of errors on consistency. Add to that his inability to hold his own with classy actors such as Vinay Pathak and Saurabh Shukla and you have yourself the version of a Parsee Akuri that has gone horribly wrong coz it wasn’t made by a Bawa. Yes, it is edible. But it could have been so much better than what it eventually turned out to be. Long way to go Shrikant Saar.


Ram (Vinay Pathak) is your average loser 35 year old – and I wonder why there are so many such movies releasing these days; maybe just to remind me that I am slowly but surely getting to a place that is referred to more often than not as “over the hill”. I hereby make a humble request to the people who are responsible for driving Bollywood and for that matter Hollywood to please move focus to much more lucrative options such as movies on the average 25 year old bimbette / dude. Nevertheless, Ram is getting over a break up with Sanjana (Mahie Gill) who is a foul mouthed (both in speech and smell), ambitious woman. She dumps Ram for someone else and is now chasing Ram to get her stuff back. Ram’s detective friend Nandu (Saurabh Shukla) is dead against Sanjana coz he senses a stench when she is around – and that’s not due to her smoking or abusive habit. He just doesn’t like her.

One evening, Ram gets a call from Nandu asking him to meet up ASAP. He reaches the Polo club and has to wait for over an hour before Nandu shows up. Nandu has been pushing Ram to get over Sanjana and find someone new. But Ram thinks his days of “picking up women” are long dead and gone. The impromptu Nandu then goes ahead and asks the girl on the next table, Koel (Mona Singh) to join them for dinner and promptly disappears after a few minutes, leaving Koel and Ram to get to know each other. Koel has just left home that morning after breaking up with Pranay, her boy friend for six years because she finds a cigarette butt with a lipstick mark on it in the back seat of the car. Did I forget to mention the used condom she finds as well… er… sorry. After some small talk and getting Koel to feel better about her life in general, Ram gets her home to sleep…. In the guest room yaar…. Corrupt minded people I say. What follows is a whole lot of confusion and chasing woven with some healthy and clean comedy.

Vinay Pathak and Saurabh Shukla are very good as always. Vinay Pathak also has a double role in the movie with the other one of an underworld don obsessed with French. The rest of the cast is extremely passé. Mona Singh hardly has a couple of dialogues which she delivers in her usual average manner. Mahie Gill goes one step closer to my opinion of her being highly over rated. She hasn’t come remotely close to her Dev D performance ever. Is this another case of succumbing in the shadow of your best performance? Stop thinking about being like Paro my dear Ms. Gill. You cannot have a role like that ever again. Delnaz Paul is at her irritating best as always. She should seriously stop acting – the sooner the better. Overall, a very loosely made movie as mentioned earlier. Could have been much better. 5 on 10 I say.

Watch the trailer at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8-N3rEAszYg