Mr Joe B. Carvalho

I write this review with no prejudice whatsoever to anyone or anything.  In fact let me clarify at the outset that I love Arshad Warsi and Soha Ali Khan.  I have been a fan of Javed Jaffrey as well for decades now.  And needless to say Vijay Raaz is one of the finest actors that India has produced in a long long time – one with a superb voice as well.

Why then would a bunch of talented actors to say the least sign up for a slapstick piece of work? One that begins with a dialogue at an open air Cocaine Factory (note that please), “Log hamesha doosron ke dhande mein apna naak dalte hain.  Hum doosron ke naak mein apna dhanda daalte hain” (Usually people poke their nose into other’s businesses.  We actually put our business in people’s noses).

What can I say? Bollywood is off to yet another disastrous start this year.  The difference between 2013 and 2014 would be that Rajdhani Express wasn’t worth watching even if someone paid you for it.  Mr. Joe B Carvalho is better off because it has never made any bones about being slapstick.  Even the trailers blatantly call the genre out without actually putting up a neon sign.

So JBC (Arshad Warsi) thinks that he is a detective par excellence.  The only person who agrees with him is his apparently blind mother Mrs. Carvalho (Himani Shivpuri).  The rest of the world knows that he is good for nothing.  What kind of a person would otherwise walk into a cocaine factory (an open air one at that) and think that they are making flour in an unhygienic environment without paying their 2^nd cable bill.

The story then moves to the angle of Car…. (the one whose name shall not be spoken – Javed Jaffrey) – the world famous killer who has made his way to the village (read Bengaluru – apparently the movie is set here without giving any landmarks as proof).  He has been hired by General Kopa Cabana (Snehal Dhabi) to kill Gehna Naidu (Geeta Basra) because she has rejected Cabana’s advances.

Should I say anymore? I dare not for risk of losing my small group of followers.  It will suffice to say that JBC is a meek attempt to create a copy of several great comedies like Hot Shots to name one.  It has its moments that do make you laugh but that doesn’t change the fact that the cast was distinctly uncomfortable with the screenplay and dialogues or the lack of them.

In summary, I will end the review of an extremely corny and limitedly comic movie with an extremely corny comment – and it embarrasses me to no end to use this statement in the first place.  Joe B Carvalho par yeh picture mat dikhao (Do what you want but don’t force me to watch the movie – the nuance is obviously better sensed in Hindi).  3 on 10 and lets hope 2014 is better than 2013 for Bollywood.

Watch the trailer on http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t0o2ZdAIqZI