Let’s start off
with the good stuff in “Tamanchey – Pyar Mein Dil Pe Maar De Goli” (TPMDPMDG)
because that is the easy part. There is
very little to talk about and can be done with really quick. I must remember to thank newbie director
Suryaveer Singh Bhullar and editor Mahesh Jaitley who ensured that the movie
was kept to an hour and forty minutes. I
would have cut a further hour and forty minutes to be absolutely sure but what
the heck. Good job Mahesh Jaitley!!!
It took every
ounce of my patience and commitment to sit through the 100 minutes and I was
extremely thankful that they didn’t test me or the 3 other people in the hall
more. The best part of (TPMDPMDG) was listening
to Kishore Kumar and Asha Bhonsle, singing to the music of RD Burman as part of
the titling. Everything else was the
proverbial slide downhill.
The movie starts
with a closed police van that is carrying a couple of criminals to jail. The van rolls off a hilly road in Uttarakhand
and voila – everyone in the van is thrown out of it. Despite the low quality 1 cm grills that are
provided on police vans, 4 human beings could have been thrown out only with
some divine intervention.
Over the
titling, Suryaveer Sir takes Babu (Richa Chadda) and Mannu (Nikhil Dwivedi)
through the jungles of Uttarakhand and eventually to a dhaba where Mannu hogs
on Dal and Rice as though it is his last meal.
They are informed through very reliable news channels that everyone in
the crash is presumed dead because magically, all bodies have disappeared. WOW!!!
Babu and Mannu
decide to spend the night at a construction site only to wake up and find out
that it is next to a cop station and is about to be demolished. The quick witted Babu decides to use a sheer
orange saree that has been conveniently left at the site to make her way out
while Mannu decides that a 30 foot jump is in order. Babu’s slutty saree wasn’t sufficient to
spice things up you see.
But wait, the
spice is not over. The predictable “I
love you” will arrive over time but before that our lead couple decide to have
their own version of the La Tomatina in a goods train. Yes!!! Sex in a goods train on tomatoes my
friends!!! This had to be the highest point in the movie. To show that the couple is unbiased, the
director ensures that they do their thing in bank locker rooms (during a
robbery) and in car dump yards as well. What
creativity I say!!!
If the story – a
confused mishmash between Bonnie & Clyde and Ishaqzaade – doesn’t make you
tear your hair apart, Rana (Damandeep Singh) will definitely succeed. The Jaat wrestler decides to become a drug
dealer because he was caught doping in competitive wrestling. Awesome!!!! Screw the system I say!!!
No one in the
cast can get worse than this in terms of their attempt to act. Damandeep has to be the worst but Nikhil Dwivedi
is not too far behind. And Richa Chaddha
obviously is in a financial mess or in love with someone associated with the film
to have not walked out mid-way. The lesser
said about the technical aspects, the better.
1 on 10 for the sex on tomatoes!!! If only it wasn’t so badly edited.
Watch the trailer
on https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mhqaFSBrQyE
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